Laura: Hello and welcome to another episode of Lexx Education, the comedy science podcast, where comedian me, Laura Lexx tries to learn science from her water drink thinking brother Normal Ron.
Ron: Normal Ron.
Laura: Hi, Ron.
Ron: Hey, how's it going?
Laura: You don't say hello I'm Ron anymore.
Ron: Hello, I'm Ron.
Laura: I like that bit. I'm good. I've got dad here at the moment.
Ron: Just recorded Agony Dad.
Laura: We have. We've just recorded an episode of agony dad for the patreon. So thank you to everybody that sent in their requests for domestic or emotional problems. We've solved them all. That is in the record now and we'll be going out later in the year. So if you want to listen to our dad solving everybody's problems with us, get on the patreon.Com/Lexxeducation.
Laura: Ron, Normally, we'd give a quick rundown of what was going to be in the episode, but neither of us have listened to it. And the title is Something About woodlice. And we can't remember ever discussing woodlice.
Ron: No. The summary notes that you made when you've done the editing are trying to read hieroglyphics. I've got no idea what this episode.
Laura: Hey, it might not be the fault of the notes. It might be that the episode is like listening to hyperclipics.
Ron: Laura is sick and Ron has fat tongue.
Laura: A fat tongue.
Ron: A fat tongue.
Laura: Well, that bit's accurate, probably, yeah.
Laura: The only notes I've made in the summary of what we covered is covering what an eye on a metal and isotope is.
Laura: So I hope that didn't take us all episodes, but it might have done.
Laura: Hey, you're about to find out.
Laura: So, listen, thank you very much, everybody, for all your chat this week.
Laura: It's been a lovely week of chat and nonsense talking about Love Island results.
Laura: The poll is still open as to which couples won the animal Love Island, so we might have to cover that next week.
Ron: And we will.
Laura: And we will.
Laura: ron's very invested.
Laura: We've got a thank you to becky.
Ron: We just got a Twitter dm.
Laura: Oh, yeah.
Laura: Read it now.
Laura: Why not?
Ron: Run cheerful, cheerful podcast festival oh, let's.
Laura: Do our podcast festival.
Ron: Oh, my.
Laura: Thank you, becky, for emailing us.
Laura: becky is binge listening and catching up, so I don't know if she's here yet.
Laura: But, hey, here's a little Easter egg for you when you get here.
Laura: Thank you for the email.
Laura: Ron loves emails.
Laura: becky suggests a bonus episode where Ron has to explain plasma to Laura.
Laura: We could maybe do it as one of the Detentron episodes and I could explain it to you, Ron.
Ron: Yeah, I have quite had my feel of explaining things to you.
Laura: All right, we'll put that on the list to do as a lecture curricular Detentron, I will learn what plasma is.
Laura: And she says the physics kind, not the blood kind.
Ron: To be honest, I'd be learning a lot in that episode as well.
Laura: Well, you already did in the other ones.
Laura: I taught you we've already recorded Fire and Glass.
Ron: Fire and glass.
Laura: You learned loads.
Laura: Yeah.
Laura: So there you go.
Laura: So if you want to hear that episode, plus agony dad all coming up in the future, jump on the patron.
Laura: We are only asking £3 a month and it really helps us to support the podcast.
Laura: Keep it going.
Laura: Mean that we'll be doing it forever.
Laura: We're like those talking donkeys on their podcast, on their adverts.
Laura: Just £3 a month can keep Laura and Ron in hosting fees on captivate.
Ron: Yeah.
Ron: And think about that value for money.
Laura: It's excellent.
Ron: We put out hour upon hour, really excellent content.
Ron: And it's not much.
Ron: No, really, it's not a lot to ask.
Laura: It's not a lot at all.
Laura: So here you go.
Laura: Enjoy an hour of that excellent content right now.
Laura: Ron, hello.
Laura: Listen, I'm going to be straight up with you, Ron.
Laura: I'm very sick.
Laura: And it's a downstairs recording episode, which means I've got a fruit bowl.
Laura: I don't hold out high hopes for this going well.
Ron: I've got a fat tongue speak.
Laura: I love that.
Laura: Like, actual Die Hard listeners, to get all of the understanding of this, would have to be listening to ten episodes ago's intro.
Laura: Last week's quiz.
Laura: Today's lesson in order to have the full context of whatever's going on.
Ron: Yeah, it's like Christopher nolan produced.
Ron: He's got to piece it together over time.
Laura: What are you doing?
Ron: A fly?
Ron: She just did a flip.
Laura: She's the coolest acrobatic cat.
Laura: So, is chemistry going to get good soon?
Laura: Because I feel like chemistry has been terrible forever.
Ron: I don't really know what you like in chemistry.
Laura: Just stuff that's a bit more spicy than just math sums.
Ron: No math today.
Laura: Well, that's good.
Ron: I think we talked a little bit about this last time and we're going to be going to the reactivity of math.
Laura: No, you can't talk like that.
Laura: I'm not going to listen.
Ron: I just want to talk about losing my teeth.
Laura: Well, then, no, we can't do a podcast, we can do a dance, but that's it.
Ron: Okay.
Laura: Have you got any cotton wall or something you can put over your teeth.
Ron: I think like a gum shield, I guess.
Ron: But the problem isn't the teeth.
Ron: The problem is my fat, fat tongue.
Laura: What about who you like?
Laura: Just keep your mouth really wide open, like a very posh person, okay?
Ron: Because then the tongue moves to compensate.
Laura: What about as?
Laura: judith?
Laura: Got any scrunchies anyway?
Laura: You could wrap it round your tongue like a little tongue bandage.
Ron: But I need the tongue to speak.
Laura: Yeah, but it's the front of the tongue that makes the sounds, isn't it?
Laura: The back of it is not busy.
Ron: I think it's all one instrument.
Ron: No, I'm going to pour some water now.
Laura: Oh, cool.
Laura: The listeners have missed hearing you drink.
Laura: I just never met anybody that makes such a palava about having a drink.
Ron: But you said that you wanted me to bring a glass.
Laura: Yeah, but just bring it full.
Laura: I don't understand why all your water.
Ron: Needs to drink all the water.
Laura: Such a thirsty boy.
Ron: I drink a lot of water, Laura.
Ron: I'm sitting and drink half a glass.
Laura: A day like you oh, give him I'm drinking half a glass every day.
Laura: I haven't drank any water for days.
Ron: That's bad.
Laura: Yeah.
Ron: You've come to this and you said, oh, I feel like s***.
Ron: I feel ill, I can't concentrate.
Ron: And it might be because you're not taking the most basic care of no.
Laura: It'S because I've got a cold.
Laura: There's nothing to do with having water.
Laura: That means I'm full of pathogens.
Ron: Yeah, but literally, the first thing anyone tells you when you've got any kind of illness is drink lots of fluids.
Laura: Why?
Ron: Because you need water to live.
Laura: I have tea.
Laura: There's water in tea.
Ron: It's a diuretic.
Ron: It makes you pierce.
Ron: It's not as hydrating.
Laura: Yeah, but it is some hydrating.
Ron: A little bit.
Laura: Well, then I reckon drink some water.
Laura: I hate water.
Ron: Water is great.
Laura: No, stop.
Laura: I think it's you've put me off water.
Laura: You and your smug little face, always drinking your water.
Laura: Stop giving your tongue a little spa bath.
Ron: I needed it.
Ron: That was actually really nice.
Laura: I can't believe I've got full flu and you've bit in your tongue and you're the one here getting more sympathy.
Ron: Well, yeah, because I've actually got a job during this podcast and I haven't.
Laura: I'm trying to absorb all this stuff.
Ron: Yeah, you do have a job.
Ron: I guess.
Ron: But you don't have a driving job.
Laura: No.
Ron: You're in the passenger seat.
Ron: You're putting on playlists.
Laura: Wow.
Laura: I'm putting on playlists and I am the playlists.
Laura: Yeah.
Ron: And you're handing me suites when I need suites and you're passing me things.
Ron: You're looking at my phone if it goes off.
Ron: But I'm driving.
Laura: Can you drive?
Ron: No, obviously not.
Ron: I actually never learned to drive because it's bad for the environment.
Laura: No, you didn't.
Laura: That's not true.
Laura: I don't know why I learned to.
Ron: Drive, but public opinion has caught up and I'm now in the right.
Laura: Right.
Laura: What are we learning today?
Ron: Chemistry.
Laura: Yeah, I know chemistry, but tell me.
Ron: What so we're going to be doing the reactivity of metals.
Laura: That sounds good.
Ron: Yes, it will be quite interesting.
Ron: It is going to build on stuff that we've done before.
Laura: No, that's never good.
Ron: Yeah, but early stuff.
Ron: The stuff that you still had enthusiasm and vigour for.
Ron: Okay, put down the fruit.
Laura: Do you know what fruit this is?
Laura: It's two nectarines.
Laura: I've got so much fruit today because you told me off for having no fruit.
Laura: Two nectarines, a green apple, a red apple, four kiwi fruits and a clump of bananas.
Ron: I didn't tell you off for not having fruit.
Ron: I said going away.
Ron: You said basically we're going away.
Ron: So we haven't bought any fruit for ages.
Laura: No, I didn't.
Laura: You assumed that because I said we didn't have any fruit in the house because we were going away, like, the next day.
Laura: And then you said, oh, you're going away in July, so you haven't bought fruit since March.
Ron: And was I right?
Laura: No, I love fruits.
Laura: Vegetables that can suck my d***.
Ron: I love vegetables, too.
Laura: Vegetables and water.
Laura: They're just not necessary.
Ron: Sorry.
Ron: jockey's getting involved, please.
Ron: yucky.
Ron: This is all seconds away from falling over.
Ron: Yeah.
Ron: So we're doing the reactivity of metals.
Ron: The first thing that we're going to tell me what a metal is.
Ron: Laura definition of a metal.
Ron: raffle it off.
Ron: papal.
Laura: Oh, yeah.
Laura: Is a positive isotope.
Ron: No, not an isotope.
Ron: What's an isotope?
Laura: I don't know.
Laura: No, I do.
Laura: Wait.
Laura: Is isotope and thing with different neurons in it.
Laura: It's the variation of neurons inside an atom.
Laura: Is a different isotope of the same atoms.
Ron: Not neurons, though, is it?
Ron: It's it says neurons are the things that are in your brain.
Laura: Neutrons.
Ron: Yeah.
Ron: Jimmy neutron.
Laura: Yeah.
Laura: I don't know what that is.
Laura: What is a method about this?
Laura: Last week, Jimmy neutron.
Ron: James chadwick.
Laura: Jimmy neutron, maybe.
Laura: Ron, I can't even begin to tell you how mushy my brain is.
Laura: I filmed mastermind between this and last week, and so all information that did not pertain to me, not embarrassing myself on national television has gone out of my head.
Laura: A metal.
Laura: It's something to do with the yeah.
Ron: You'Re just using the wrong word.
Laura: So it is a positive something?
Ron: Yeah.
Ron: It's like three words.
Laura: Molecule.
Ron: No.
Laura: Ion.
Ron: Yeah.
Laura: Metal is a positive ion.
Ron: Oh, goodness me.
Laura: I'm just going to write down atoms of different cells again, just that says potif.
Laura: I'll know what it means.
Ron: Maybe write down what an ion is.
Laura: Ion is an electrical electron.
Laura: Something has gained an electron or lost an electron, therefore has a charge.
Ron: Yeah.
Ron: I haven't even finished defining the topic, and my laptop's already locked it to 73.
Laura: Lack of view, but I have got it all right so far.
Ron: Yeah, we're on episode 34.
Ron: We covered this in episode two.
Laura: Wrong.
Laura: But actually hey.
Ron: Hey.
Laura: The thing is, the words are very difficult for me to hold on to because they don't mean anything.
Laura: Ion I'm just about getting to grips with since I came up with my idea of an ion and an iron being similar and needing electricity, and that is working wonders for me.
Laura: Continue.
Ron: So we know what a metal is now.
Ron: We know.
Laura: And it pulls its electrons no, it.
Ron: Doesn'T have a charge.
Laura: You said it was a positive ion.
Ron: No, a metal is an element that forms a positive ion.
Laura: Right.
Laura: Hang on, because I've written down a metal.
Laura: It's a positive ion.
Ron: Let me just let me off.
Ron: You write everything down.
Laura: Go and let your element that form a positive ion.
Laura: The whole head feels like it's full of grass.
Ron: May as well be.
Laura: It's like a little meadow in there.
Ron: No, it's a brown sight that they can't develop on because it's like some f****** endangered species of wood life under the t***.
Laura: Yeah, but there's, like a really small number of people in the world who f****** love this wood lies.
Laura: And as soon as I gather enough of them together, I'm going to be a super star.
Laura: All I need is 30 to 50,000 more people with an absolute bogon for Wordlife and it's all going to come up.
Laura: Laura god, you're so noisy in the drinking.
Ron: Yes, my tongue is massive.
Ron: It's reverberating.
Laura: Hey, shut down in the comments.
Laura: Would you rather have a wood loss, turt brain or a massive tongue?
Laura: Let us know.
Ron: Right.
Ron: So metal oxides.
Ron: We know one metal oxide.
Ron: Very well.
Laura: Rust.
Laura: Iron oxide.
Ron: Rust.
Ron: Exactly.
Ron: Boat cancer, according to the dad from Step Brothers.
Laura: Yeah.
Ron: Metals react with oxygen.
Ron: Oxygen is a nonmetal, therefore it forms a oxide.
Ron: No, it forms a molecule.
Laura: Negative ions.
Ron: Yes.
Laura: Metals form positive ions and everything else forms negative ions.
Ron: Literally the definition.
Ron: Yes.
Laura: So metals always lose their electrons and everything else always takes them.
Ron: Yeah.
Laura: I swear to God, this is brand new information.
Ron: No, we did a lesson on this.
Laura: No, I don't think we said it like that, though.
Ron: Because it's just what it is.
Laura: Maybe it's all going to be clearer while I've got calls.
Laura: Maybe if I just stay in a permanent state of infection, I'll be a genius, though.
Ron: This isn't you being a genius.
Ron: This is basic recall of simple facts that we've gone over, like, three or four times.
Laura: So metals always lose electrons.
Laura: Everything else always gain.
Laura: All right.
Laura: Yeah.
Ron: Remember, because the metals are on the left hand side, they've only got, like, a couple of electrons.
Laura: What?
Ron: Think about your sodium.
Ron: What, the periodic table where we.
Laura: Wouldn'T that be cute to have on the wall, like a little boxes and you're just a bit of each one in little tubes.
Ron: Been done.
Laura: Really?
Laura: Yeah.
Laura: That's nice.
Ron: Tell you what the cold is doing.
Ron: You've just got the confidence for some reason today.
Ron: whoa.
Ron: It's just, wow, what a connection.
Ron: All of the metals are losing their languages.
Laura: So but hydrogen is not a metal.
Ron: No.
Laura: That's on the left.
Ron: It's the one exception, because it is.
Laura: Just where they f****** get you in it.
Laura: With the exception.
Laura: It's like a service charge.
Ron: What I think this cold might have done is I think you might have just just fallen off the bottom of the dunning kruger effect.
Laura: Also, the metals go on way more than the left.
Laura: They go right over the halfway point, well into the right.
Laura: They go right up to number twelve.
Ron: They don't always lose all of these.
Laura: Even further than that.
Laura: aluminium is a metal.
Laura: So tin and lead.
Ron: Yeah.
Ron: All these famous metals that you've heard of in real life yeah.
Laura: Well, what are you talking about then?
Laura: They're all on the left.
Ron: Yeah.
Ron: And then they have nonmetals to the right of them.
Laura: Stuck in the middle with bismuth.
Ron: So they're not on the right, are they?
Laura: Well, they are.
Ron: No, the noble gases are on the right and then there are some nonmetals.
Laura: Yeah, but it's not to say that all the metals anyway, this isn't irrelevant.
Ron: All of the metals, the block of metals is on the left.
Laura: Most things are metal.
Laura: You are being sassy.
Ron: But this is part of the problem is I come off like the villain every because it's like wine's wrong.
Ron: Getting so frustrated.
Ron: laura's, just like laura's, try my best.
Ron: She's learning this all.
Laura: It's because I've been through this.
Laura: Ron, I don't know what you thought was going to happen here that you were going to tell me once and I was going to be like, f*** me, I'm a queen of science now.
Laura: And then we'd move on somewhat.
Laura: No, if I taught you how to drive, we wouldn't get in the car once and then you'd know how to do it.
Ron: Yeah, but I also wouldn't get in after 34 weeks of training and they'd be like, Laura, the accelerator makes us go forward.
Laura: Actually, maybe you would.
Laura: Maybe that would be the place where you're not smart.
Ron: Oh, I'm not smart in cars.
Ron: That's why I've never learned how to drive.
Ron: Maybe that season two rods up to.
Laura: Travel when we get our television contract deal.
Laura: That's the word I was looking for.
Laura: It was hiding under a wood loss.
Ron: Right.
Ron: So oxygen is a nonmetal, forms a negative ion.
Ron: Metals on metals form positive ion.
Laura: Do all metals rust?
Ron: They all form metal oxides, which is what we're talking about now.
Ron: Yeah.
Laura: Tin oxide.
Ron: We call this an oxidation reaction because the metal gains an oxygen.
Ron: Okay.
Ron: Yes, it's being oxidised.
Ron: Now put the fruit down.
Laura: Yes.
Ron: You're rubbing it on the microphone.
Laura: It was really nice and cool on my cheeks.
Ron: Later we're going to talk about oxidation reactions that don't involve oxygen.
Laura: Did you ever used to when you're a little like I'd pretend I was putting blusher on because I was rubbing something red on my face.
Ron: No, I'm a boy.
Ron: None of that gay s***.
Laura: Really had an effect on you used to be stuck in ally.
Ron: Yeah, I actually think that shredding that money was it could have gone to some poor people somewhere.
Ron: Absolutely worthless.
Ron: anywho while we're talking about, we just.
Laura: Talked about a lot of topical things for right now, 22nd and November, but this is going out in like February 2023.
Ron: Yeah, the lamborghs are used to that now.
Laura: Yeah, it's a fun little time capsule.
Ron: The light diist.
Laura: The plan was that we talk about topical stuff in the intros and outros, but then we always forget, they always.
Ron: Descend into nonsense, nonsense, nonsense, nonsense.
Ron: At least that's maybe you shouldn't be living here.
Ron: Anyway, the opposite of an oxidation reaction is a reduction.
Ron: Hands on faces aren't writing.
Laura: Well, that doesn't mean anything.
Ron: It does.
Laura: What did you say oxidation is?
Laura: Reduction?
Ron: No, I said the opposite of that.
Laura: What did you say?
Ron: I said that the opposite of an oxidation reaction is called a reduction.
Ron: This will come up again.
Laura: I want to try and write opposite upside down.
Laura: I like it when you say, this will come up again.
Laura: It's like watching a film where the exposition is real bad.
Laura: You're like in Love Actually where they're like, oh, what should we get mum this year?
Laura: I feel like we've been bad brothers this year.
Laura: We are brothers from the same huawei.
Laura: Mum, this will come up again.
Laura: Students should know colin firth's wife is banging his brother.
Laura: Told you it would come up again.
Ron: She started on your Christmas film early.
Laura: No, but I hate love, actually.
Laura: I just think the script is so shonky.
Ron: Yeah.
Ron: I would like Love Actually if you could just toggle on and off the storylines that you wanted.
Laura: Yeah, just toggle all of them off.
Laura: Except Emma Thompson.
Ron: Except Emma Thompson and Bill nye.
Laura: Yeah.
Ron: Do you want to come in again?
Ron: She's so needy here's.
Ron: 15 minutes past her food time, to be fair.
Ron: Right, okay.
Ron: How long have we been going?
Laura: 20 minutes.
Ron: F*** me.
Laura: Well, you're not trying to teach me anything.
Ron: I am.
Laura: Well, I've written down everything.
Ron: What's a reduction reaction?
Laura: The opposite of an oxidation reaction.
Ron: Okay, but what does it mean in terms of what the reaction is?
Laura: I don't know.
Laura: You haven't told me that bit yet.
Ron: Well, I told you what an oxidation reaction is.
Laura: That's getting rusty.
Ron: Yeah, right.
Ron: So what's the reduction?
Laura: Rust going away.
Laura: I guess it loses oxygen out the metal.
Ron: Yeah.
Laura: How did it have oxygen in there in the first place?
Ron: Because there was an oxidation reaction.
Ron: So the next bit that we're going to move on to is called the reactivity series.
Laura: Okay.
Ron: Basically, the reactivity of any metal is related to its tendency to form positive ions, because obviously metals don't form molecular bonds with things.
Ron: So all the bonds that they have to form will either be the metallic bonds, but if they're doing that, they're not really reacting with anything, or they're forming positive ions.
Ron: So their reactivity is directly related to how easily they do that.
Ron: Does that make sense?
Laura: It wasn't.
Ron: Yeah, you can say no.
Laura: No, I'm going to say yes on that one.
Ron: All right, in your own words, just say it back to me.
Laura: Well, how reactive a metal is is all about how easily it makes positive ions, because that shows how game for a laugh it is, how free BGB its electrons are.
Laura: Because it has carpool electrons.
Laura: Ron, is this the right direction?
Ron: It has a carpool of electrons?
Laura: Yeah, it pulls its electrons hey, did you know that put the word pool?
Laura: It doesn't come from, like, a pool.
Laura: Like, we've dug a pool and put everything in there in the middle.
Laura: It comes from the french word for chicken?
Ron: Sure.
Laura: There was a game called a poole, as in French for chicken, where people would bet on chickens racing and you throw all your money in together.
Laura: And that's where we get pool from, as in carpool or other pool.
Laura: Pool your resources.
Laura: That means checking your resources.
Laura: Isn't that fun?
Laura: But it also makes sense, as in, like, a little puddle of money or a pool of money.
Ron: I guess that makes sense because I don't think many of the ancient brits were selling themselves by swimming pool.
Laura: No.
Laura: So that's why they are reactive.
Laura: Yeah.
Ron: I don't understand what you're saying.
Laura: They do all the pooling of electrons.
Ron: Yeah.
Ron: But if they're doing that, they're just in a metal, aren't they?
Laura: Yeah.
Ron: So what have they reacted with oxygen?
Ron: Well, no, because they're in a metal, so they're not doing that.
Laura: Well, I don't know what you're talking about anymore, then.
Ron: When a metal reacts with something yeah.
Ron: It has to form an eye off.
Ron: Yeah, it's got nothing to do with it pooling its electrons.
Laura: It depends on how reactive it is.
Ron: No, the reactivity depends on how easily it forms a positive ion.
Laura: That's what I said.
Ron: Yeah.
Ron: Then I asked why, and then you start talking about it pooling its electron.
Laura: Yeah, because if the electrons are pooled, then they're easy to lure away, aren't they?
Laura: childcatcher style.
Laura: If you think if everybody's got a one to one in a nursery, it's hard to steal a kid, but if you've just put them all in the middle, it's much easier.
Ron: Yeah, but it's still one to one in the pool.
Laura: They're just all in a pool.
Laura: Okay, that's a weird analogy, even by my you know, when you're kidnapping gosh.
Laura: Well, I don't really understand what you're asking me here.
Laura: What's the question?
Laura: Why are they reactive?
Ron: Do you understand that or why metals reactivity would be directly related to its tendency to form positive ions?
Laura: No.
Ron: The easier it forms an ion, the easier it can react with something.
Ron: Because the reactions that a metal goes through are usually it forms ionic bonds with things.
Laura: What's an ionic bond?
Ron: That's a joke.
Ron: I'm going to go let the cat, because oh, no.
Laura: I hate it when you leave me to think about what I've done.
Laura: Ron back.
Laura: Yeah.
Laura: I feel like you're asking me questions in circles here.
Laura: Hi, nucky.
Laura: Well, it's because, like, you're saying, how easily they form ions is dependent on how easy they form ionic bonds.
Ron: Yep.
Laura: That feels like the same thing.
Ron: No, an ion doesn't have to form an ionic bond.
Laura: Isn't it ionic?
Ron: The reason why it feels like we're going in circles is because with all of these learning things, we're not living in some kind of simpsonsesque world where things reset at the end of each episode.
Ron: What happens is that we learn something, and then the next week, or maybe several weeks later, in this case, there will be a new thing that requires the prior knowledge.
Ron: It's a bit like a series of television where something that happens in episode one or two might affect what happens in episode seven or eight.
Ron: Or maybe there'll be characters that you've never seen before.
Laura: Yeah.
Laura: But they have those handy bits at the beginning where they say previously on Royal housewives of New York well, that's.
Ron: Kind of what your notebook should be.
Ron: Yeah.
Ron: And then this brunette lady shows up, but can't really remember who.
Ron: She's a mom.
Ron: I don't know.
Ron: They were on a bus for a bit, but don't really know what they were doing on it.
Laura: Then they'd just be half a page of lies.
Laura: Yeah.
Laura: Well, listen, ionic bonds.
Laura: The ones on the bus.
Laura: No, that is a carbon bond.
Laura: What's a carbon bond?
Laura: You said is we did diamonds and the carbons made a put the biscuit down.
Laura: You're going to hurt your tongue again.
Laura: You're going to hurt your tongue.
Laura: What kind of a bond does carbon make?
Ron: Starting to feel quite dejected now.
Laura: No, because I'm really trying.
Laura: What kind of a bond does a carbon make?
Ron: It worse.
Ron: I wish it was an act.
Ron: I wish you didn't care.
Ron: I wish I didn't care.
Laura: Hang on, I'll look in the book.
Ron: How about you doing all the biscuits?
Ron: No, we're doing chemistry.
Laura: Chemistry.
Laura: covalent bond.
Ron: Yeah.
Laura: That's a carbon bond.
Ron: Yeah.
Laura: Covalent.
Laura: That's the bus one.
Laura: Metallic is where they just pool them and all hang around together.
Laura: So ionic is the borrowing one.
Ron: Yeah.
Laura: Right, okay.
Ron: Happens between a metal and a nonmetal.
Laura: Okay.
Laura: So now go back to the question.
Laura: What was the question?
Ron: It was just whether it made logical sense to you that the easier a metal forms a positive ion, the more reactive it is.
Laura: Oh, yeah.
Laura: Because it means it's got looser electrons.
Ron: Yeah.
Ron: So it can give them away to.
Laura: The election loads of scents, because electrons.
Ron: Themselves are very reactive.
Laura: Yeah.
Ron: So if you can shed those electrons, they're going to go start messing s*** up.
Laura: Yeah.
Laura: Okay.
Ron: Now, all metals can be put in what is called the reactivity series, with the most reactive metals at the top and the least reactive metals at the bottom.
Laura: Okay.
Ron: The oldest metals that we know are the ones that come right at the bottom.
Ron: Can you think why that is?
Ron: Things like gold and iron and stuff like that?
Laura: I guess because they were unreactive.
Laura: They were more useful to us because we could mould them and use them for stuff.
Laura: You could heat the sword up and make it into a sword without it exploding and taking your eyebrows off.
Ron: Exactly, yeah.
Ron: Because things like potassium and sodium and stuff like that, they don't tend to exist in nature.
Laura: Yeah.
Laura: They're not real metals.
Laura: Like metal is stuff.
Laura: You can make jewellery and weapons out of that.
Ron: Strike that from the record.
Laura: But you know what I mean?
Laura: The more non reactive a metal is, the more proper metal it is.
Ron: Yeah.
Ron: They're not like a traditional metal.
Laura: Yeah.
Laura: S***.
Laura: Metals.
Ron: Yeah.
Ron: Out of the metals that we've talked, like, can you deduce where on the.
Laura: Periodic table students should be able to.
Ron: Deduce students should be I'm testing you a bit here.
Ron: Can you deduce where you think roughly the most reactive metals are going to be?
Laura: Group seven.
Ron: Talk me through it.
Ron: Why do you think that?
Laura: Talking about group seven?
Ron: No, I'm talking about on your periodic table.
Ron: Group 17.
Laura: Well, they're not metals.
Ron: No, I didn't bring them up.
Ron: You think that manganese technician rhenium and borium, those are the most reactive?
Laura: No, I think the most reactive one I've heard of is, like, radium.
Ron: Why do you think that sounds like radioactive?
Ron: Well, it's radioactive.
Ron: That doesn't mean it's reactive.
Laura: Radio reactive.
Ron: Sounds like Imagine dragons.
Laura: Best off radio reactive.
Laura: swamp brain.
Laura: So the lower down they are on the left, the more reactive they are.
Laura: So the bottom left hand corner would be the most reactive one?
Ron: Exactly.
Ron: And why is that?
Laura: Because it's a bigger gap between their protons and their electrons.
Ron: Yes.
Ron: And specifically, each row of the periodic table is.
Laura: Bigger.
Ron: What does each row mean?
Laura: Smaller.
Ron: Smaller what?
Laura: Each row.
Ron: Means a shell of electrons, doesn't it?
Ron: So in the first row we've done this before.
Ron: In the first row, we've only got hydrogen and helium.
Ron: There's only two electrons in the first shell.
Ron: In the second shell, there are eight same in the third shell.
Laura: And then you go down do you know what, Ron?
Laura: I actually was confused about rows and columns again.
Laura: Can we you mean across us?
Ron: I mean across us, not up and downers.
Laura: I was like, I haven't got helium on my first row.
Laura: And I see now a row and a crosser.
Laura: A column.
Laura: Yes.
Ron: All right.
Ron: What does the column mean, though?
Laura: What do you mean?
Ron: What does the column denote?
Laura: More electrons.
Ron: Yeah.
Ron: So yeah.
Ron: So everything that's in group two has two electrons in its outermost ring.
Laura: Yeah.
Ron: So, yeah, you're absolutely right.
Ron: The bottom left corner is the most reactive corner.
Laura: Yeah.
Ron: Francium, I think for some reason that I don't know, cesium is the most reactive metal.
Laura: Well, this is f****** bullshit, then.
Ron: But I think it might be because francine doesn't exist for very long.
Ron: I think it might be radioactive.
Laura: Where does it go?
Ron: I think it's radioactive.
Laura: I don't really know what radioactive means.
Ron: No, we'll get onto it quite soon.
Ron: In physics.
Ron: Yeah.
Ron: It's an intensely radioactive metal.
Ron: It's half life is only 22 minutes.
Laura: What's a half life?
Ron: How much time it takes for half of a thing to decay.
Laura: What a measure?
Laura: Why would you measure because with radioactive how old are you?
Laura: 18.
Laura: I measure birthdays in halves.
Laura: Mysterious sphinx of a girl.
Ron: No, you gravely misunderstood what I'm saying.
Laura: Yeah, that sounds about right.
Ron: So you've got a kilogramme of Franceium, takes 22.
Ron: Minutes for half of that to go away.
Ron: How long does it take for it all to go away?
Laura: 44 minutes.
Ron: No, because after 44 minutes, only half of what was left has gone away, so you've got a quarter left.
Laura: Why does always half of it go?
Ron: Because radioactivity is about probability.
Ron: Because if it was about, like, half a kilogramme per 22 minutes, we'd measure it like that, but we don't.
Ron: It's a half life.
Ron: Half of whatever you have will disappear in 22 minutes.
Laura: Does it destroy itself?
Ron: It radioactively decays.
Laura: That's magical.
Ron: Yeah.
Ron: halflives are how we measure half.
Laura: What does decayed francisium, what is that, then?
Laura: When it's decayed?
Laura: francium, what's happened to it?
Ron: It depends on what type of radiation it emits.
Ron: Let's have a look, shall we?
Laura: Yeah.
Ron: It'S the second rarest naturally occurring element after my smile, it decays into astatine, radium and radon.
Laura: That's where we get the shower gel from.
Ron: So there's different types of radioactive decay and yeah, they all changed what element is but yeah, so after 22 minutes, you've got half of the French that you used to have.
Laura: Right.
Laura: Well, at least you've got half.
Ron: Yeah.
Ron: But then after another 22 minutes, you've lost half of that as well.
Laura: Well, you have to be grateful for what you've got in the moment.
Ron: Right.
Ron: What else do we need to talk about?
Laura: A little like a scarecrow.
Ron: You've got a head full of grass talked about before.
Ron: The nonmetals hydrogen and carbon are often included in the reactivity series.
Laura: Right.
Ron: A more reactive metal can displace a less reactive metal from a compound.
Laura: Hang on, that feels like something that's going to come up in the quiz.
Laura: Wait, what was this page?
Laura: More reactive metal pushes out a less reactive metal because it's more reactive.
Ron: So you can kind of think of it as being sort of more attractive to the thing that they're reacting with.
Ron: Yeah.
Ron: And that's probably a good place to leave it before we get into something else bigger.
Laura: Okay, well, I think this has been an absolute advertisement for if your child is sick, don't make them go to school, because, yeah, you might be able to get on the bus and get there, but nothing's going in, buddies.
Ron: No.
Laura: It's a waste of everyone's time, including rons.
Ron: Yeah, but, I mean, got to keep topping up the swamp, keep pouring stuff in, and then eventually something might stick.
Laura: Yeah.
Laura: covalent bus, metallic pool, ionic borrowing.
Ron: Yeah.
Laura: Right, ron, this genuinely, I know I say this every time we do a quiz, but genuinely, it's been, like, over a month, hasn't it, since we did the lesson?
Ron: By far the longest that's ever been in between.
Laura: Yeah.
Laura: Because whilst we're currently in February, at the time that this is being poured into your ears, I'm recording it sat next to the remnants of a gingerbread house with an advent calendar that only has days to go.
Laura: We've had a little break to record the Christmas episodes.
Laura: So we haven't got the quizzes done.
Laura: It's been forever ago.
Laura: There's no fairness involved in quizzing me on this.
Ron: No.
Ron: And when putting together the quiz earlier today, I remember yucky, stop there.
Ron: I remembered how much you hated this lesson.
Ron: Have you got your notebook with you?
Laura: I have.
Laura: I haven't looked at it yet, in case you want me to try and remember what's in the lesson.
Ron: Yeah.
Ron: First question, as always, can you remember what we studied?
Laura: I know it was chemistry.
Ron: Yeah, I think I said no.
Ron: You know that because I told you we were recording Physics Today.
Laura: Aha.
Laura: And from that information, I have deduced that it is chemistry that we are quizzing on.
Laura: But, no, I have no idea.
Laura: And in fairness as well, we also redid that moles episode in between recording this episode and doing this quiz.
Laura: And that was chemistry too, so I can't be expected to remember.
Laura: Was it quantitative chemistry?
Ron: No.
Laura: Was it is it raining in Brussels?
Ron: It is.
Ron: That's a lot of people with a mark on their bingo shoes.
Laura: Yeah, that's niokis in it's raining.
Laura: f*** off.
Laura: We're on.
Laura: There we go.
Laura: What else have we done with chemistry?
Laura: Oh, was it the one where they're all in little families and they all behave different ways in their families reactivity, if that's what that's called.
Laura: They had similar traits if they were on a seesaw with an acid.
Ron: Yes, that's part of it.
Laura: Is that a point?
Ron: This isn't part of the quiz.
Ron: That's just how we start the quiz.
Laura: Do you know what's annoying as well?
Laura: Is that we're going to do an episode after this and then we're having Christmas break and a little holiday, so it's going to be another month before that quiz.
Laura: So this is just two quizzes in a row I'm going to absolutely eat mud on.
Ron: OK.
Ron: All right, let's jump into the quiz.
Ron: So there is 1235 here's, a feature.
Laura: Usually that will happen.
Laura: Your bingo ron just counts for a while in his adding up world.
Ron: Shush.
Ron: Now, five points on offer.
Ron: First question.
Ron: What is a functional group?
Laura: I think a functional group is a column on the periodic table where they have similar behavioural properties.
Laura: In that group.
Ron: I'm afraid functional group is a do you remember we were likening it to, I think, attachments for your kitchen aid or something that you can put on a molecule and then that bit of the molecule reacts the same no matter which molecule it's on.
Ron: No, that's fine.
Ron: Question number two, what's the difference between oxidation and reduction?
Laura: Bloody h***.
Laura: Well, they don't sound like they're similar at all.
Laura: I'd say reduction is where you do an experiment and something leaves the compound of molecules, and oxidation is when oxygen gets added to a molecule covalent bond.
Ron: Sorry, I wasn't listening for the third bit.
Ron: You say that again.
Laura: Reduction is where something leaves a substance and oxidation is where oxygen adds itself.
Laura: Like okay.
Ron: With that in mind, the answer that you've given for oxidation, do you be more specific with the answer that you're giving for reduction?
Laura: If this is that reduction is when oxygen leaves, then call it oxiduction.
Laura: Don't call it reduction.
Laura: Oxidation and oxidoction.
Laura: That is the way to do that.
Laura: Science.
Ron: Well, no, for reasons that are like a level you're going to say it.
Laura: Didn't I just say it?
Laura: Oxygen leaves.
Ron: No, you said, if that's oxygen, that leaves.
Ron: And then you try to tell science how to do it better, because obviously Albert einstein was standing on the shoulders of giants and you're just kind of squirming in the corner telling about the terminology.
Laura: Sassy.
Laura: You need a holiday, mate.
Ron: Right, question number three.
Laura: Basically, I'm right.
Laura: Say it so that I can put the ding noise in you're.
Laura: Right, thank you.
Ron: Number three.
Ron: What do you get when you react copper oxide and carbon?
Laura: Does it go green?
Laura: Oh, no.
Laura: Copper dioxide.
Laura: Copper, carbon.
Laura: Copper oxide.
Laura: Copper, carbon dioxide.
Laura: Carbon, copper.
Laura: Hang on, I'm going to have a sink.
Ron: Another one for the bingo charts.
Ron: Don't just say things.
Laura: What was it?
Laura: Carbon, copper and oxygen.
Ron: No, it's copper oxide and carbon.
Ron: yucky.
Ron: Being a problem.
Ron: It's unprofessional.
Laura: Copper oxide and carbon.
Laura: Do you get copper and carbon dioxide?
Laura: Yes.
Ron: Well done, Laura.
Ron: Not so swampy today, right?
Laura: I don't remember that, but I worked it out and had a good guess.
Ron: Yes.
Laura: I didn't work it out.
Laura: That's not fair to say, but I had a good guess because what's exciting she's really got her bomb hole in your ear.
Ron: Yeah.
Ron: They formed a tube.
Laura: You are like one of those cells in a flow.
Ron: Laura, what is a way that two ways, namely two ways that a metal can oxidise.
Laura: So it can rust, which is like it forms like a crust with oxygen on the surface of it.
Laura: And then maybe when it burns, is that oxidising?
Ron: Well, yeah, because burning is just reacting with oxygen in the air, isn't it?
Laura: Yeah.
Laura: With something as a catalyst to, like, make not always.
Laura: Okay, then.
Laura: Yeah.
Laura: I would say burning and rusting.
Ron: Some metals, you could just set five to yeah.
Ron: So that's two marks.
Ron: So I think in 221-2344 out of five marks.
Laura: Oh, my God.
Laura: I am so happy with that.
Laura: Considering the break, that is just about the best thing in the whole world.
Ron: Yeah.
Ron: You were lucky that I leave for a 17 hours flight tomorrow, because if I'd put more time into this, I could have come up with some trickier stuff.
Ron: But I was impressed with your deductions, considering that I assume none of that came from memory.
Laura: No.
Laura: And looking at the notes now, you wouldn't even know that that was off that stuff.
Laura: This is all about ions.
Laura: Oh, that does say oxidation, but that says oxidation equals reduction, so I don't know if that's real.
Laura: And then I've put covalent bus, metallic pool, ionic borrowing, which no idea.
Laura: Well done, me.
Laura: Let's not question how it happened.
Laura: Let's just accept my genius and move on.
Ron: Let's celebrate your successes.
Laura: Yes.
Ron: Hooray.
Laura: Well, we're on.
Laura: That episode was what it was.
Laura: Was the woodlash chat?
Laura: Good?
Ron: We'll never know that episode happened.
Laura: Hey.
Ron: They just listened to it.
Laura: It all happened in your ear.
Laura: Going back a few episodes, because we got a message from Squirrels on the theme of Raggedy from a couple of episodes back.
Laura: And squirrels said they'd never heard of raggedy but their childhood terror was the big bad banksia.
Laura: Men from snugglepot and cuddlepie Ron, click this link that I've put in the notes and have a look at the big, Bad banksia Men.
Laura: I'll put this in the show notes as well, so you can have a look.
Laura: It's sort of like a horrible hairy peanut with human legs coming at the bottom, dangling a baby by its leg and holding a rock in the other hand, like it's about smash the baby.
Ron: Up and a sideways v***** half the way up.
Laura: Yeah.
Laura: Absolutely horrible.
Laura: So thank you, Squirrels, for sending us that run.
Laura: Imagine that kissing raggedy.
Ron: Maybe there's sexual dimorphism and that's one gender of the species and Raggedy is the other one.
Laura: It's really horrible.
Laura: It seems to be an Australia thing.
Laura: Or any of our other Australian listeners very scared of the big, Bad banksia Men.
Ron: I do like that.
Ron: It just says they saw a terrible thing.
Laura: Yeah, but is that oh, no.
Laura: If I scroll down a little bit, it's dangling the baby over a hole in the floor.
Ron: Oh, did you not see that?
Laura: No.
Ron: Here he goes.
Ron: This is the end of him.
Laura: It says, oh, God, there's another one of running away with the baby.
Ron: Enough of this.
Laura: Yeah.
Laura: We'll see you next week for another episode of Wonderful Lacks Education.
Ron: Cluster Smith, your snuggle cuddle pies.
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