Nutwood

 Laura: Hello and welcome to another episode of Lexx Education, the comedy science podcast, where comedian me, Laura Lexx, tries to learn science from him in in the noisy chair. It's the only abnormal thing about him. It's his noisy chair. Maybe it's not the chair. Maybe it is his b***. Nobody will ever know.

Ron: Normal. Ron.

Laura: Hey, Ron.

Ron: How's it going?

Laura: I'm Ron. Somebody the other day was saying they wished that we'd put, like, because I put this on YouTube, but just with a placeholder picture. And somebody was saying, oh, I wish you'd put the video of the records on. And that dancing would have been a plus.

Ron: Really good moment of it, but more 100 more patrons before we ever do that.

Laura: Yeah, I think we'd need a producer at that point to sync up video and noises. Like, it's just not viable as a workload, is it? Anyway, hello everyone. Welcome to the show.

Ron: Welcome to Lexx Education, the Comedy science Programme, with me, Ron and her Laura Lexx.

Laura: Hello, I'm Laura Lexx.

Laura: I feel really sick.

Laura: I've eaten so much butternut squash and it's Laura.

Ron: We just spoke 20 minutes ago.

Ron: Why have you just been gorging on gourd since then?

Laura: I did.

Laura: I actually ate them before we did the other record.

Laura: But the sickness has only just come on now.

Laura: Can you get buttonuts?

Ron: I don't think so.

Ron: The other day I was playing Dungeons and Dragons with some friends of mine and in the town I'm the dungeon master in the town that they live in, there's a woke armoury and it's all sorts with vegan leather handles and stuff.

Ron: It's very, very funny.

Ron: They went in there and someone was surfing the canopies that were made out of pumpkin and then everyone on my DND stream just saw me go s*** and run out of the room because of 3 hours where I've been playing D and D.

Ron: There was just some button that squash in the oven.

Ron: Yeah.

Laura: Oh, that was oh yeah.

Ron: They were like little black cups.

Ron: Yeah.

Laura: Oh, nice.

Laura: I do mine in the air fryer now, it's much quicker.

Laura: Anyway, I said we do very little preamble because most of the episode is preamble anyway.

Laura: We've got some thank yous.

Laura: We've got a thank you to justronomicon for your lovely review on Canadian Apple podcasts.

Laura: Thank you very much for leaving.

Laura: Your review apparently justtronomicon works in a lab and Lexx Education reminds of them why they love science.

Ron: We can pack up and go home.

Laura: Yeah, we won't, because we want your love and attention, but we could.

Laura: So thank you very much for your review.

Laura: Happy birthday.

Laura: We've got a birthday shoutout.

Ron: Becky was shut out this week.

Laura: Waits here at Mackie's Diarrhoea.

Ron: Stop ruining Becky's birthday talking about your dog's broken a******.

Laura: Happy birthday, Becky.

Laura: And if you've got a birthday or a bodily function coming up, let us know.

Laura: It won't be worse than this birthday, Becky.

Laura: We hope you have a s*** free birthday.

Ron: We hope you have one to three ships on your birthday.

Ron: Don't wish constipation on lovely Becky.

Laura: No.

Laura: Yeah, no birthday constipation.

Laura: Ron, you're quite behind in your birthday tour.

Ron: I didn't know who's going to be doing that every time.

Laura: Well, it's become a feature now, so you can go on with it.

Laura: I'm coming to visit you.

Laura: In fact, I'll be there as people are listening to this, so I'll make you do them while I'm there.

Laura: So there you go.

Laura: And hello to all patrons.

Laura: Fabrats.

Laura: Hello, you legends.

Laura: How did you like the geography lesson?

Laura: Hope you enjoyed it over the weekend.

Laura: If you want an extra Lexx education in your ears every month, join the patreon.

Laura: Patreon.com Lexxeducation.

Laura: And there is a shiny episode all about metico sitting in there, ready for you to listen.

Laura: Just £3 a month.

Laura: We're trying to keep it as cheap as Patreon advises.

Laura: Any cheaper than that, we lose money, technically, and the more people that join, the more episodes we'll put out extra.

Laura: So do join.

Laura: There.

Laura: That's it for Notes up top.

Laura: A trigger warning on today's episode or a content warning.

Laura: We are discussing cancer in today's episode.

Laura: Obviously, we're not glib about the idea of people getting cancer, but this is a comedy podcast and we are discussing what cancer is from a scientific perspective.

Laura: If that's likely to upset you or is a little bit too close to home for you, maybe just avoid today's episode and we will love you another time.

Laura: But just a heads up that that is going to be discussed.

Ron: Very trigger warning.

Ron: Raggedy.

Laura: If you are scared of a wood gnome from Reap at the Bear, also, give this episode a myth.

Laura: Anyway, enjoy the episode.

Laura: We love you very much.

Laura: Bye, ron I think I'm going to have to become one of those people that has nothing on their desk except their computer.

Laura: My desk is so messy and it's ridiculous.

Laura: In fact, my whole office is disgustingly messy.

Laura: I always used to wonder why Dad's office was a trash heap all the time and I'm just turning into him.

Ron: Yeah, I have that.

Ron: Except my desk is very tidy.

Ron: But then the room that I'm in is h***.

Laura: Why is the room you're in h***?

Ron: Because of all the trash.

Laura: Oh, I see.

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: Well, this whole room is a mess.

Laura: And because I come up here and I do work and then I finish my work and I go back downstairs and then I just leave crud everywhere.

Laura: It's just covered in crud constantly.

Laura: I think I just need to have nothing on the desk and then it will be really obvious when crud is starting to build.

Ron: Yeah, that's kind of the approach that I've gone for.

Ron: I've got three plants, I have a coaster and I have a small wooden zebra.

Laura: I just found a load of Vaseline in my ear.

Ron: We'd be in you.

Laura: And it I did put the vaseline in there, but now I've found it again, I thought I'd washed it all out.

Laura: Oh, my God, my ear is so slippery.

Ron: Look at my small wooden zebra.

Laura: Hang on, where have you gone?

Laura: Oh, that's cute.

Laura: I've got a hippo.

Laura: That would go really well with that.

Ron: Have you had it since you were a kid?

Laura: My friend Lucy Knight gave it to me when I was at secondary school.

Ron: I've had this sebre since I was a child and I don't know where it came from.

Ron: And then I asked mom and dad recently, thinking that they'd be like, yeah, that came from your grandfather in Africa or something like that.

Ron: And they were like, aren't they?

Laura: We'd stop paying attention by the time you were born.

Ron: Yeah, it's a mystery heirloom, but I'm quite mystery Zabra.

Ron: I'm quite fond of it.

Laura: Oh, it's quite cute that you're calling an heirloom.

Laura: That is the closest we're going to get to heirlooms in our family, I think.

Ron: Yeah.

Laura: My God, look at the trash here.

Laura: I'm just surrounded by chocolate orange boxes.

Ron: Sounds very self inflated.

Laura: Yeah, there's just trash everywhere.

Laura: Do you want a pouch full of photos of me and Will Duggan?

Ron: Yes.

Laura: Here you go.

Laura: Look, thousands of pictures of me and.

Ron: They'Re not even you together.

Laura: No.

Laura: Do you know how much money the National Treasures podcast loses every month?

Laura: One.

Ron: No.

Laura: We can't afford to go and have photos taken together.

Laura: Right, you do the lesson and I'm going to tidy my desk while you do it.

Ron: Okay, we do borrowed you today, though.

Laura: You're so kind.

Laura: I really expected you to say no.

Laura: Laura, that's ridiculous.

Laura: Please pay attention to me.

Laura: I've prepped hard for this lesson, but you just go.

Laura: Okay, but hey, how about a little bit of listening?

Laura: If I make it interesting?

Ron: I'm very nice.

Ron: It's like my thing.

Laura: Yeah, that might be why I'm not learning anything, because I'm like, well, Ron won't hit me if I don't know this.

Ron: No.

Ron: Did you have teachers?

Laura: You see, like, hit me with the whole don't disappoint anyone feeling.

Laura: And now I have such a crushing fear of disappointing anyone that I can't function.

Laura: Hey, how's this, though?

Laura: I got a pension recently and it's like an investment pension type of thing.

Laura: I don't really understand how it works, but anyway, I now have a wealth manager who manages my wealth.

Ron: I found out recently that my pension is something I need to be keeping track of.

Laura: What do you mean?

Ron: I've been working since I left uni full time, like five years now, and I've been paying into a pension the whole time and apparently I need to keep track of that.

Laura: Well, they should be adding it up.

Laura: Surely it's all in one account.

Ron: Well, no, because different companies have different pension providers.

Laura: Oh, yeah, because you've changed companies.

Laura: Yeah, I'm forever seeing adverts on the tube about consolidate all your pensions into one manageable pension and I thank God I'm 36 and I've only just got one.

Laura: Some people are out there with loads.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: I mean, I've got three.

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: I am going to be relying on you for food and warmth when I'm an elderly lady, just so that you know that's okay.

Laura: Unless this podcast really takes off and then I might have something.

Laura: Do you know what?

Laura: I had a very vivid daydream this afternoon that you would get asked on taskmaster before me.

Laura: I plan the whole thing in my head, right, where you'd say to me, Laura, I'm not going to do it because it's really your dream and it's not fair that they've come to me.

Laura: And I was like, no, Ron, you should do it because the podcast needs the publicity and you're a great guy, but you should make it explicitly clear that it's not fair that you got picked for it.

Laura: Even though I've worked really hard in the industry.

Ron: If I got invited on taskmaster, I'm telling you to eat s*** and I'm going on taskmaster.

Laura: But would you make a fuss and say, Why are you overlooking Laura?

Laura: She's brilliant comedian.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: Once we filmed it.

Laura: No, every day on setron.

Laura: Are you standing up my right?

Ron: No, I film all the tasks and then in the studio, I'll pick up a first boom.

Laura: This is everything that's wrong with the entertainment industry.

Ron: If they came to me and they were like, oh, Ron, do you want to be on Qi or Mock the Week or something?

Ron: I'd be like, no, you should ask My.

Laura: No.

Laura: Go on, qi.

Laura: You'd be good on qi.

Ron: I'd be good on taskmaster.

Ron: Be way better than you.

Ron: That's why I was building up what?

Laura: Well, you'd be better at doing the tasks.

Laura: I don't know if you'd be more entertaining.

Ron: No, but that's what I'm saying, is that, like, on an average panel show, I'd be like, no, step aside, let Laura do it on taskmaster.

Ron: No, obviously I need to do that.

Laura: I think Qi would be the first panel show I'd put you on.

Ron: Yeah, I'd be good on Qi.

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: What would be your dream panel show to go on?

Laura: By the way, I've nearly finished hiding my desk.

Ron: We'll get into the lesson in a bit.

Ron: Qi is up there and I do really like Sandy toxbig but you would just be like, Where's Steven?

Laura: Would you?

Laura: No, I think I prefer Sandy.

Laura: I think Steve I'd be more relaxed with Sandy.

Ron: I do really like her and I think she was the best person for the job after Stephen Fry.

Laura: I miss her.

Laura: On.

Laura: Bake off.

Ron: Never watched Bake off.

Laura: I love bake off.

Ron: But does Task Master count as a power show?

Laura: Yeah, I reckon.

Ron: Well, yeah, that's the absolute dreaming.

Ron: It looks like the most fun thing in the world to do.

Laura: Yeah, it does, doesn't it?

Laura: I really want to go on House of Games as well.

Laura: Basically, getting paid to play Christmas games.

Ron: I find that kind of game difficult, though.

Laura: I love that sort of thing.

Laura: I'm so competitive.

Ron: No, I think I wouldn't like that.

Ron: I find that stressful.

Ron: Wouldn't want to go on Pointless.

Ron: I don't know enough about, like, soaps or cricket and that sort of thing.

Laura: Yeah, I want to go again on Pointless because it was not fair getting off in the first f****** thing.

Ron: Yeah.

Laura: And there's some things I know loads about.

Ron: I haven't really watched many panel shows recently.

Ron: Oh, I'd love to go on Room 101.

Ron: I have strong opinions about things.

Laura: What would you put in Room 101?

Ron: Cheering first thing.

Laura: What's wrong with cheering?

Ron: Oh, gosh.

Ron: Just every round.

Ron: Like, who are you hanging out with.

Laura: That'S cheering every round.

Ron: Oh, my God.

Ron: I have a friend that wants to cheers every sip.

Laura: Who is this friend?

Laura: Eve.

Laura: Eve.

Laura: Oh, Eve.

Laura: I like you, Eve, but what the h*** is this?

Laura: Cheering every six.

Ron: Isn't she a mad woman, Eve?

Ron: Oh, God.

Ron: I'd get rid of cheering so quickly.

Laura: Listen, Eve, I don't know if you listen to this podcast, but I've known you since you were 18, mate, and you're like a little sister to me.

Laura: Pack that the f****** pack it in.

Laura: Stop it.

Ron: Some people, they're like, oh, you got to make eye contact.

Ron: You can't cross arms.

Ron: There's different things you've got to say.

Ron: Get rid.

Laura: I don't know.

Laura: Cheering does not come up that often in my life.

Ron: I drink a lot more than you.

Laura: Yeah, I drink a lot.

Laura: I don't know if you drink more than me.

Laura: I think you drink with other people more than me.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: I don't mind it if it's just like, one other person and you kind of do it on the first drink or something.

Ron: Again, not your issue.

Laura: Cheers with me, Judith.

Laura: We're alone now, that's fine.

Ron: But then you got to click with everyone at the table.

Ron: Get rid.

Laura: That's how I feel about saying hello and goodbye to people.

Laura: I would love to just leave every event when I'm ready to leave without saying goodbye to anyone.

Laura: And for that not to be rude.

Laura: I hate saying goodbye and hello to people.

Laura: I just think you should be allowed to just melt into whatever room is there and then that's acceptable.

Laura: And then you just melt away again.

Ron: That's weird.

Laura: Why is that weird?

Laura: But your weird friends that cheers every 20 seconds aren't?

Ron: No, they are weird.

Ron: I'm saying, put them in seeing someone that not only wants to do an Irish goodbye, but also wants to do an Irish hello.

Laura: And, like, say you turn up to something and the conversation is already in full flow and then someone comes in, you have to break off what's happening so that every single person, oh, hello.

Ron: Just walk in and say, Hi, everyone.

Laura: Yeah, but then people start getting up to do hugs and stuff.

Laura: It's nasty.

Ron: Bizarre, okay.

Ron: Should we do the lesson?

Ron: Have you tidied your desk yet?

Laura: Yeah, I have, actually.

Ron: All right, hang on.

Ron: I need to unlock my laptop.

Ron: Close.

Laura: Because we would cheque hey, let us know on the socials, what would you like to put in room 101?

Ron: What panel shows would you like to see Laura and Ron on, and which ones would you want Ron to step aside for Laura?

Laura: Gallantly and which ones would you want Laura to turn down for Ron to.

Ron: Do any hoos so we're doing biology today?

Ron: Laura yes.

Ron: We're going to do two things.

Ron: We're going to talk about cancer and then we're going to talk about communicable diseases.

Laura: Communicable, I love this word.

Laura: Okay.

Ron: Do you know what cancer is, Laura?

Laura: I think it's when you start growing cells that aren't meant to be there.

Ron: In some cases, but actually it's just the growth of the cells that defines the cancer in the first place.

Ron: So cancer is just the uncontrolled growth of cells.

Laura: All right.

Laura: And that's an official definition, is it?

Ron: Yes.

Laura: Biology.

Laura: Cancer equals uncontrollable growth of cells.

Laura: That's why you sell things, say things like it's spreading like cancer.

Ron: Exactly.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: This is very bad.

Ron: Growth in multicellular organisms is highly controlled and limited.

Ron: A healthy cell can only reproduce a certain number of times, and we have, like, steadfast genetic mechanisms that prevent it from repeatedly reproducing.

Laura: After he got a bite of chocolate orange.

Ron: And I saw that and actually I had quite a lot left to say, so I was like, okay, Laura's, a professional feel of chewed and swallowed by the time I'm done.

Ron: But no, you're really savouring.

Laura: Is that because the quality control on the cell reduces the number of times it's reproduced?

Laura: Do they get worse as you reprint them?

Ron: Why it can only reproduce a certain number of times?

Ron: Yeah, no, actually, we have something at the end of our DNA called telomeres.

Ron: And basically every time that this isn't part of the cylinder, I've already written it down.

Ron: It's interesting.

Laura: I really guessed on the spelling, though.

Ron: Yeah, we have telomeres at the end of our DNA, and we have something called telomerase, which is an enzyme age, and basically every time it reproduces, your telomeres get shorter and shorter and shorter, and then it's kind of like a time limit.

Ron: But cancer cells, they don't have this.

Ron: They can keep reproducing.

Laura: Okay, so a cancer cell then it's not like a special type of cell.

Laura: It's a cell that's gone rogue.

Laura: It's any type of cell that's gone rogue.

Ron: Yeah, they often do.

Ron: A cancer cell is a broad definition of any cell that's doing this.

Ron: Cancer is just uncontrolled.

Ron: Grace okay, this is bad for obvious reasons.

Ron: Do you want to hazard a guess as to why this is such a huge problem, considering that we're made up of cells, so having a bunch more feasibly might not be a problem.

Laura: Well, you get tumours, don't you?

Laura: So I guess if you've just got this like uncontrolled growth of cells, it builds up these like big blockages of useless dead cell, I guess.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: So sort of structurally, like, if you had an uncontrolled growth in your brain, that's going to start like pressing on all the other stuff around it.

Ron: So structurally that's an issue.

Ron: Similar like with your lungs or your liver.

Ron: Any of these things that have like a set structure, can they block nerve signals?

Ron: I'm sure if you had a tumour pressing on a nerve, that would mess you up.

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: What about if you had a tumour that was made out of a cell that produced something?

Laura: Oh my God.

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: You're going to have p*** everywhere.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: So if you had a nephron tumour yeah.

Laura: You'd just be making whiz all the time.

Ron: P*** rocket shooting across the room.

Laura: So if you have say, cancer of the liver, you've got too much liver being made and then you're too good at getting dirt out of your blood.

Ron: No, because livers are made up.

Ron: Livers have a very set out structure and they have several different types of cells that make up the liver.

Ron: Cells make tissues, tissues make organs.

Ron: So they have several different tissues in the liver.

Ron: So if you have a growth in that, it's not just going to tessellate the tissues perfectly, it's just going to be a watch of something.

Laura: So it just makes everything less efficient.

Laura: And then because it's uncontrolled, it is just going to reproduce.

Laura: Reproduce until you die.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: It's also going to use uploads of resources in that area of your body oh.

Laura: To keep reproducing the cell very energy.

Ron: Dependent thing to just keep growing.

Ron: And then the other thing is, like, if you get if you had a tumour that was let's say you had a tumour in your pancreas or your hypothalamus, like an endocrine gland, something that produces hormones.

Ron: If you have loads of hormone producing cells that are uncontrollably growing.

Ron: You're just going to be making s*** loads of that hormone and that's going to pop you up.

Laura: And then that's going to have knock on effects elsewhere in the body.

Ron: Exactly.

Ron: That's going to have really wide reaching effects.

Laura: Okay.

Laura: So that makes sense then as to why the cure for cancer is like poison and radioactivity is you're trying to stop those cells.

Laura: You are trying to kill off or poison parts of your body.

Ron: So when it comes to chemotherapy, the reason that that works is because chemotherapy attacks growing cells or attacks reproducing cells.

Ron: So that actually happens all over your body.

Ron: It's the reason why you lose your hair when you go through chemotherapy is because your hair is growing.

Ron: So it falls out when you have the chemotherapy because that is attacking growing cells.

Ron: And it just so happens that cancer cells are growing faster than any other cell in your body, so they suffer more from it.

Ron: But every cell in your body suffers from chemotherapy.

Laura: Gosh.

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: Okay.

Laura: Yeah, that makes sense.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: Not all growths are cancers, so a benign tumour is not considered a cancer.

Laura: Is that because it is it is growth or unprecedented or unwanted growth, but it's not uncontrollable growth?

Ron: Yes, it's it's not out of control.

Ron: I think it's a growth, and it has grown, and it's not how things should be.

Ron: But it says that benign tumours, they are contained to a specific part of the body as well, and they're often contained in a membrane so they don't invade other body parts, which, like a malignant tumour would.

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: So that's why sometimes you might have to excuse me.

Laura: You might have to wait before where they go, like, oh, it could be cancer, but we don't know.

Laura: We've got to wait.

Laura: Is that like measuring the growth in a certain period of time?

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: I don't know.

Ron: I think you can tell by looking at the structure and the makeup of the cells quite a bit.

Ron: I think cancer cells cancer cells, I think, are one of those things where when you see, like, a microscope image of them, they do look evil.

Ron: Like, they're kind of jaggedy.

Ron: Like, you know, that Rupert the Bear book that we had when I was a kid that had that not to.

Laura: See that segway coming.

Ron: It had that horrible little fistle boy.

Laura: What?

Ron: The horrible thistle boy?

Laura: And he was really what are you talking about?

Laura: Thistle boy?

Ron: I don't know if he was I think he might have been made out of thorns.

Laura: What is Ron talking about?

Ron: He was horrible.

Ron: He haunted my nightmares as a child.

Laura: Why did you have a roof at the Bear Book?

Laura: You were born after me.

Ron: Spiky boy.

Ron: He was made out of thorns or something.

Laura: Oh, wait.

Laura: Is he called Raggedy Scoogle?

Laura: Raggedy, yeah.

Laura: Okay, so he looks kind of like a mosquito with barbed wire for hair.

Ron: Isn't he awful?

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: What is he supposed to be like?

Ron: I'm looking at hang on, let me send it to you, because there looks like there's a couple of different versions of him.

Ron: Oh, God, he gives me the willies.

Ron: I hate him.

Laura: Where did you encounter him?

Ron: In a roof at the Bear Book.

Laura: What?

Laura: Rupert, the bear.

Laura: I don't remember having a roof at the Bear Book.

Ron: Maybe it was Grandma and Grandpa's.

Ron: This this image of him.

Laura: Hang on, are you showing it to me, or is it on WhatsApp?

Ron: It's on WhatsApp web?

Laura: Hang on, let me open the WhatsApp web?

Laura: I closed it so I could pay attention to you.

Ron: I appreciate that you're welks.

Laura: Oh, yeah.

Laura: It looks kind of like in winter when trees have lost their leaves, and then you get the really cool, like, silhouette of black trees against a sunset or just the paler sky.

Laura: He looks like he's made of those bare black leaves and also kind of a mosquito in a tunic.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: And that's kind of what cancer cells look like.

Ron: They are cursed.

Ron: They look evil.

Laura: What did Raggedy do?

Laura: What was he meant to be?

Ron: He was horrible.

Laura: Was he actually a horrible character or did you just not like the image?

Ron: I think certainly I just didn't like the image.

Ron: But I think he was mainly just kind of a grouch and he didn't necessarily hurt other people.

Ron: But Rupert was I don't really remember what Rupert the Bear's character is like, but I think Rupert was like, let's be friends, let's eat the honey.

Ron: And then Raggedy's like, no Raggerty, is.

Laura: A wood troll living in Nutwood Common.

Laura: He made his debut in Rupert and Raggedy.

Ron: Yeah.

Laura: What's a wood troll?

Ron: There's not much about him online.

Ron: I can only see this one picture.

Laura: Oh, he is in villains, though.

Laura: He's in TV series characters, male characters and villains.

Ron: See, I've just found a YouTube video called Raggedy Scariest Kids character.

Laura: Let us know in the comments if you also have Raggedy haunting your dreams on the regular.

Laura: Are you?

Laura: Team Ron on the raggedy.

Ron: Honestly, Raggedy never really never really scared me from what I remember as a child, but remember my mum being terrified of him, and she always was, since a child.

Ron: I completely forgot about him until today when my mum bought a vintage Rupert annual.

Ron: I don't for the life of me know why.

Ron: And inside there was a story about Raggedy.

Ron: I told her it was in there, in here, and she completely freaked.

Ron: Admittedly him as a puppet is definitely pretty creepy.

Ron: Not so much as a drawing cartoon.

Ron: That's the top comment on this video.

Laura: For a second, I thought you were just telling me about it and I was like, I think Mum was a pair of fracity.

Laura: Well, I think Mum was like a functioning adult woman.

Laura: But you were telling me about something else.

Ron: We should message Mum about raggedy, though.

Ron: I bet she knows what I'm all about.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: So that's raggedy.

Ron: There are lots of factors that affect cancer development.

Ron: Can you name a few, Laura?

Laura: Smoking, drinking, diet, exercise, getting enough sleep.

Laura: Sun.

Ron: Yeah.

Laura: Exposure to radioactivity.

Laura: So they can be broadly carcinogens.

Ron: Yeah, they can be broadly split into two categories.

Ron: Environment.

Laura: That's more praise than just it was really good.

Laura: Yeah, say it then, you f****** dance.

Laura: Next time I'll come and see you, I can dress up as Raggedy.

Laura: I'll get off the air, just wake you up in the morning, dress as Raggedy over your bed.

Laura: I'll bring you a reaper outfit.

Ron: Really don't like that.

Ron: They can be broadly split into two categories, environmental and genetic.

Laura: Okay.

Ron: Environmental includes basically everything you said genetic is genes.

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: All right.

Ron: And we can go into that a bit if you want.

Ron: I don't know if anyone on this podcast particularly wants a lecture about what can give you cancer.

Laura: I mean, I think we know, don't we?

Laura: Get told quite a lot.

Laura: It's all the stuff that's nice to do.

Ron: Yeah, basically.

Ron: Yeah, but yeah, unless you read the.

Laura: Daily Mail and then you're never sure whether red wine is going to give you cancer or cure cancer.

Laura: They put a lot of pressure on red wine to beat everything.

Ron: Antioxidants.

Laura: Yeah, but oxygen is good for you.

Ron: Yeah, but oxygen and oxidants are different.

Laura: What?

Ron: Do you not see how they're different words?

Laura: Yeah, but oxidant and accident are basically the same word.

Laura: And they're the same, are they?

Laura: I don't know.

Laura: I just found out.

Laura: I don't know what an oxidant is.

Ron: What's an oxidant?

Laura: I don't know.

Laura: I thought you knew.

Laura: You were the one talking about them.

Ron: Oh, like an oh, I yeah.

Ron: No, an oxygen is not like an accident.

Ron: What are you talking about?

Laura: What's that word that's the opposite of the orient?

Laura: Is that an occident?

Ron: I don't know.

Laura: Occidental.

Laura: Doesn't that mean something?

Ron: The western part of the world?

Ron: Yes, the opposite.

Laura: The accident.

Ron: I didn't know that.

Laura: Yeah, it's the opposite of orient, I think.

Laura: Yeah, I know stuff, Ron.

Laura: I half know loads of things.

Ron: Okay.

Ron: Yeah, that's cancer thoughts?

Laura: Sounds bad.

Ron: It is bad.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: Let's move on in our comedy podcast to Infection and response.

Laura: Cool.

Ron: What are you doing on your laptop floor?

Laura: Thinking of a tweet.

Ron: Why?

Laura: Because I don't find it very easy to focus.

Ron: Yeah, focus up, please, because we just dealt with a difficult subject.

Laura: Sorry that you had to deal with raggedy on the same day you're dealing with the cancer subject.

Ron: I brought that on myself.

Laura: My notes are not good run.

Laura: So far I've written telomeres, which you said is not important.

Laura: Raggedy from Rubber Bay.

Laura: And then I've put environmental stuff, genetics, genes.

Laura: So let's up this game.

Ron: I don't feel like that's on me.

Ron: I think I did quite a good job of digging.

Laura: Yeah, well, but this is only as good as what makes the paper.

Ron: You know what, though?

Ron: This is why your biology scores aren't what you'd expect from listening to the episode, is because you're more interested and you get it, so then you feel like you don't have to write it down.

Laura: But then why haven't I still got it next week?

Ron: Because your brain is broken.

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: How do we fix that?

Ron: You write it down.

Laura: I'm trying to.

Laura: What should I written down?

Ron: Well, all of the stuff that we talked to where it just kind of.

Laura: Wrote about raggedy cells go wild.

Laura: What did you say?

Laura: You said this one picture of raggedy.

Ron: I want to see more.

Laura: Why, you don't like it?

Ron: Yeah, because why is it just that picture, though?

Ron: It should be everywhere.

Ron: He's awful.

Laura: No?

Laura: Yeah, but Rupert was, like I don't know if Rupert's been, like, niche again yet.

Laura: Has he?

Ron: I don't know.

Laura: Does he have the word personality?

Laura: I think it was, like just a goody two shoes, wasn't he?

Laura: Rupert.

Ron: There's not even a picture of Raggedy in the bloody Rupert the Bear Wiki.

Ron: Who's reading the rupert of the bear wiki.

Laura: You your creep and you're specifically looking for a character you're scared of.

Ron: Yeah.

Laura: Did you ever watch the Raccoons?

Laura: Were you scared of Cyril sneer?

Ron: No, I never watched that.

Ron: I think.

Laura: Stop Pervin on Raggedy and talk to me.

Ron: Oxidants, basically, are very powerful mutators.

Laura: Powerful mutators.

Laura: If you say mutator as mutator, it's like a cow potato.

Ron: Delicious.

Ron: Right, we're moving on.

Ron: Okay, do infection and response.

Ron: Okay.

Ron: Do you know what a pathogen is?

Laura: It's a bad thing, I believe.

Ron: Yes, but I don't know.

Laura: Is it like a spore of virus that gets in you?

Laura: Stop looking at Raggedy.

Ron: I'm looking at the silly bus.

Laura: Ron just picked up his phone and flounced it onto the screen to show me.

Ron: Pathogens.

Laura: Your laptop is hot.

Laura: I can hear the phone again.

Ron: Yeah, I don't know why.

Ron: I do know why.

Ron: I've got a billion tabs open, but I need those tabs.

Laura: He needs those tabs.

Laura: Hey, look, my eyebrows are so thick.

Laura: You can't tell which one's chocolate orange and which one's my eyebrow.

Laura: They made chocolate oranges really veiny nowadays.

Laura: Look at that.

Ron: You really said that with, like, when you're a kid and you're allowed to sit at a grownups table for a meal and then you're like, I've got a joke.

Ron: That was really the vibe with which you said that.

Ron: Professional comedian.

Ron: It's very funny.

Laura: I think that is my vibe.

Ron: Just as gracious that you're allowed to speak.

Laura: Yeah, no, I should always be speaking.

Laura: I'm very fun.

Laura: I'm fun to be around me.

Laura: I'm a blast at any party.

Ron: Right, so pathogen is like a virus or a bacteria that causes you said that.

Ron: Just because I've said something doesn't mean I'm disagreeing.

Laura: Yeah, but you didn't give me any praise when I said it.

Ron: I didn't realise you needed that much validation.

Laura: And that is reasonable.

Laura: If somebody is out of that common zone and trying their best and they you say, what's a pathogen?

Laura: And they give you, like, a dictionary definition answer, you could say.

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: What was your answer?

Laura: Said it's like a virus or a bacteria spore that gets in you.

Ron: Put this right.

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: Thank you.

Laura: F****** h***.

Laura: That's all you had to say.

Ron: Episode 33.

Laura: Oh, it's not episode 33 of what is a pathogen knows it.

Laura: No, but I can't just be patting.

Ron: You on the back.

Laura: Yes, you can.

Laura: Yes, you can.

Ron: I feel like I reacted badly to that.

Laura: I didn't say anything.

Laura: You sat there and then carried on with the content.

Laura: Oh, my God.

Laura: No wonder I'm not learning anything.

Laura: I don't even know if what I'm saying is right or wrong because there's no support coming for me.

Ron: I'll tell you if you're wrong.

Ron: How about that?

Laura: Yeah, f****** I know you will.

Laura: You're just like dad.

Ron: So.

Laura: Patricia laura, well done.

Laura: Oh, my goodness.

Laura: You are so lovely and you're trying really hard.

Ron: So pathogens microorganisms, like viruses or bacteria that cause infectious diseases.

Laura: Infectious.

Laura: Where am I?

Ron: Known as communicable.

Laura: Communicable.

Ron: Communicable.

Laura: Communicable.

Ron: Communicable.

Laura: We're going up for honey.

Laura: Communicable.

Ron: A pathogen can't survive on its own.

Laura: Like me.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: They depend on the host, sometimes in different ways.

Ron: Like viruses literally cannot reproduce on their own.

Laura: That makes them a parasite.

Ron: No.

Laura: Why?

Laura: Makes them a pathogen and a pathogen is a parasite.

Ron: Where have you got that from?

Laura: Because they depend on the host.

Laura: They can't survive on their own.

Ron: That's the definition of a pathogen.

Laura: What's a parasite, then?

Ron: I think a parasite is like a multicellular organism that depends on a host.

Laura: I'm sure you can be a pathogen and a parasite.

Laura: Look at that.

Ron: Yeah, I think parasites are pathogens.

Ron: I don't think all pathogens are parasites.

Ron: I think they are viruses.

Ron: Parasites?

Laura: Yes.

Ron: No, they're not.

Ron: Yeah, they're not.

Ron: Shut up, please.

Laura: No, they won't.

Ron: Yes, viruses can't even reproduce without them.

Ron: Bacteria can, but pathogenic bacteria will want to.

Ron: The conditions inside your body are much, much better, which is why they start spreading as soon as they get in.

Laura: I don't think the conditions inside what are you reading?

Ron: I can see your lips moving.

Laura: I was that's because I was talking to you.

Ron: But you are reading.

Laura: I'm not reading, I'm choosing a new screen saver.

Ron: Why?

Laura: Because you're not being very kind.

Laura: So why do I listen?

Ron: You don't listen.

Laura: I've been listening.

Laura: You said pathogens and parasites are the same thing, which I'd already said.

Laura: We could have saved 20 minutes there.

Laura: I've changed it to a real nice picture of mackey.

Laura: It was already a picture of mac.

Ron: Produce toxins that damage the tissues around them.

Ron: That's why you feel sick when you've been infected with these things.

Laura: What do what are you saying?

Ron: Who does what we're going to talk about in this?

Laura: No, go back.

Ron: Well, f*** us up then.

Ron: Jump.

Laura: Pathogens.

Laura: Pathogens.

Laura: Pathogens make you sick?

Ron: Yes.

Laura: Okay.

Ron: That was what we backed up.

Laura: Well, I don't know.

Ron: Bacteria and viruses make you think why do they make because they make toxins that damage tissues and that makes you.

Laura: Feel ill.

Laura: Make toxins, bash up tissues.

Ron: So basically what we're going to talk about in this section is how you can avoid diseases by essentially avoiding contact with them, but then also about how the body tries to keep them out on natural defences.

Ron: What's the number one defence we have against pathogens?

Ron: Laura?

Laura: Washing your hands for 30 seconds.

Ron: I mean in terms of our anatomy.

Laura: White blood cells?

Ron: No, before that.

Laura: Skin.

Ron: Skin?

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: Keeps the pathogens out.

Ron: You're in like a leather bag.

Ron: How are they going to get in?

Laura: That's why when you have a cut you have to keep it clean.

Ron: Exactly.

Ron: And then once they get in yet, we've got the immune system that destroys them and gets rid of them.

Laura: Yes.

Ron: We'll talk about antibiotics.

Laura: Holes in your body to be full of acid.

Ron: Only one of the holes in your body's full of acid.

Laura: Maybe your body, not mine.

Laura: Which one?

Ron: Your tummy.

Laura: There's no hole in my tummy.

Ron: Your mouth.

Laura: Yeah, but it's not like my mouth is full of acid.

Laura: No, your v***** has a PH level.

Ron: It does?

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: Well, everything's got a PH level.

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: Your v***** is acidic.

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: Keeping all the bugs out.

Ron: Yeah.

Laura: If you got a dirty d***, it's going to deal with this.

Ron: Antibiotics we'll talk about.

Ron: And we'll talk about antibiotic resistance, so that's fun.

Laura: Oh, yeah.

Laura: Terese Coffee said I can just take one antibiotic, throw the rest of the packet in the bin, or pass it along to my friends.

Ron: Yeah, that's mad, because everyone really wasted their rumping over that picture of her drinking wine and smoking a cigar, but she actually turned out to be a f*** nut.

Laura: I love that picture of her.

Laura: I'm like, Dan, that looks like a politician I want to hang out with in that photo.

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: She spilled a fizz down her front.

Laura: She's chuffing on us.

Laura: I'm like, yeah, finally.

Ron: Just like peeking straw like some doctors smoke, but they still know what they're talking about.

Ron: The fact that she's smoking and having a glass of wine doesn't matter.

Ron: A f****** thistle's d***, like, it's just the fact that she has no qualifications for the job is the main problem.

Ron: How long have we been going?

Laura: About six months at this point.

Ron: Unhelpful.

Laura: In two weeks time, it'll be our Valentine's Day episode.

Laura: Ron.

Laura: The truth about what is love.

Ron: We should do a Valentine's Day episode.

Laura: I've already put it in the schedule, mate.

Ron: Have you?

Ron: Yes, we stopped updating that schedule many months ago.

Laura: No, I keep on top of it.

Laura: That's not true right now.

Laura: It's a recent development issue right now.

Laura: Ronald.

Ron: I'm checking.

Laura: Yeah, okay.

Ron: What about the columns that say editors are uploaded that stop on episode three, the first day of releases?

Ron: What about the episode titles that stop on episode nine?

Laura: Well, those aren't needed anymore, but the rest of them, in terms of when the Christmas episode is going out and when other future fun episodes are going out, those are in the structure.

Ron: I see.

Ron: Okay.

Laura: Apology denied.

Laura: How long have we been recording in minutes?

Ron: Yes.

Laura: Four times ten to the power.

Laura: 142.

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: 4.2 times ten to the power one.

Ron: So much of that was raggedy.

Ron: Chairs.

Ron: I did my dissertation on antibiotic resistance.

Laura: Yeah?

Ron: Yeah.

Laura: When an antibiotic is going to stop working and the population will die.

Ron: Well, probably never.

Ron: Well, we need new antibiotics is the thing.

Laura: Where are we going to get them from?

Ron: We could develop them.

Ron: We can find more in nature because antibiotics are often found because they're natural defences of bacteria and we actually aren't very good at cultivating bacteria.

Ron: It's a very narrow Schleff of bacteria that we can cultivate.

Ron: So if we improve these things but.

Laura: If we've just put them all in yoghurt instead of doing anything functional with.

Ron: Them what do you mean?

Laura: That's how you get bacteria, isn't it?

Laura: Yoghurt?

Ron: No, but there's hundreds upon millions of bacteria, species, like, in the soil that we can't cultivate.

Ron: They probably have antibiotics that we could use.

Laura: Why can't they just let's get more scientists on that then.

Laura: Let's just take all scientists, stop making new hand dryers and cars and stuff and do reducing CO2 in the atmosphere and antibiotics.

Laura: Everyone working on stuff.

Laura: Get on that.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: And if you listen to this podcast and you don't finish a course of antibiotics when you're given one, f*** off.

Laura: And if you listen to this podcast and you want to send me some praise, you're welcome.

Laura: Lexxeducation@gmail.com.

Ron: Yeah, if someone wants to do a super cut where I'm doing everything losses, they just go, yeah, good job, Laura.

Laura: I'd love that.

Ron: I'd love to hear it.

Laura: All right, so we pausing there, then.

Laura: The quiz better be 99% raggedy questions.

Ron: Wow.

Ron: Nut word.

Laura: All right, ron, quits.

Laura: Yeah, we've done that before.

Laura: I know you do.

Laura: It's weird, though.

Laura: It's so great.

Laura: It's quiz time.

Laura: We did what did we do last week?

Laura: Oh, my God.

Laura: It feels like forever.

Ron: Oh.

Laura: By oh.

Laura: Cancer and things like that.

Laura: Okay, I feel good about this quiz.

Laura: I can do this.

Ron: Can you hear squealing in the background?

Laura: She's trying to come in.

Laura: She loves your podcast.

Laura: Oh, yeah.

Laura: It's been a while since we had Yoki on the podcast.

Laura: Hi, Nyuki.

Ron: I didn't hear what you said then.

Laura: I said, hi, nyuki.

Ron: She is sniffing the biscuits.

Laura: That sounds like a fun euphemism.

Laura: Spent the weekend sniffing biscuits.

Ron: Yeah, so we actually we didn't cover loads of content last time, so it's a light quiz.

Laura: I love a light quiz.

Laura: My best kind.

Ron: Don't knock over the microphone, little one.

Ron: Laura, there's only three points in this quiz.

Laura: Okay.

Ron: Go over there, Laura.

Ron: What defines a cancer?

Laura: Uncontrollable growth of cells.

Laura: Ron.

Ron: Yes.

Ron: Well done.

Laura: I was thinking about this because someone commented on one of my videos the other day, she's as unfunny as cancer, or she's as funny as cancer.

Laura: And I was trying to not reply to trolls, but in order to not reply, I have to come up with the response just in my head so that I can drop it.

Laura: I was trying to come up with a sassy comeback that was like, yeah, my career has got uncontrollable growth.

Laura: It's not really like a zissy.

Ron: Little do they know, your benign growing in a sack.

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: Speaking of question number two, why are benign tumours not considered cancerous?

Laura: Because they don't have uncontrollable growth.

Ron: Yes, but can you elaborate?

Laura: They just grow a little bit, but they're not growing fast enough that they're going to take over everything.

Laura: They have telomeres.

Ron: All right.

Ron: No, you've strayed into what is quickly becoming known as just saying things.

Ron: No.

Ron: So they are contained to a specific part of the body and they are often contained in a membrane.

Ron: That's why I said you're benign career in a sack.

Laura: I don't think we talked about that.

Ron: We did, but that's okay.

Laura: Hey, Ron, it's a fruit episode.

Ron: Kiwi.

Ron: Like a kiwi?

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: Have I told the Kiwi story before?

Laura: I don't know.

Ron: Why?

Ron: Max, who you've met before yeah, nutella.

Laura: He pronounced natala weird.

Ron: He claims that his aunt was in the room when Kiwis were named Kiwis.

Ron: Now, he doesn't have the audacity to say that it was her idea, but claims she was in the room.

Laura: The room where it happened.

Laura: The room where it happened.

Laura: Where it happened.

Ron: You know what they were called before that?

Laura: No.

Ron: Chinese gooseberries.

Laura: I thought that was a whole different fruit.

Laura: I thought a facialis was a Chinese gooseberry.

Ron: Wait, let me double cheque this fact.

Ron: I mean, the whole story is bullshit.

Laura: I thought Chinese goodsberry was those little, like, orange things that come in a paper lantern.

Ron: No.

Ron: A Chinese gooseberry is a kiwi.

Ron: I was correct.

Laura: What am I thinking of then?

Ron: You are thinking of a facilities.

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: That's called a cape gooseberry or a.

Laura: Golden berry or a Chinese lantern.

Laura: There we go.

Laura: I've mixed up the load of it.

Laura: Well, thank you, Max's aunty, for solving all our issues.

Ron: Anyway, last question is, Kiwis aside, what's a pathogen?

Laura: A pathogen is a thing that can't survive alone.

Laura: It depends on a host.

Laura: It's a virus or a bacteria.

Ron: Yes, that could be true of things that aren't pathogens, though.

Ron: Mackie depends on you.

Laura: No, she doesn't.

Laura: She's independent.

Laura: Mistress.

Ron: She's not.

Laura: She is.

Ron: She's essentially a small furry pocket that food falls into.

Laura: Undoubted.

Laura: Yeah, so I said it's a virus or bacteria.

Ron: Yeah, but what about biffodous digestiveness?

Ron: Good.

Laura: Bacteria pathogens make toxins which bash up your tissues, make you sick and they're communicable.

Ron: Yes.

Ron: So they depend on the host and they are antagonistic to that host.

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: And they're allergic to your skin.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: No, that's not a thing.

Ron: Two out of three.

Laura: Smashing.

Laura: It raising the bar on the all biology.

Ron: Whoop.

Ron: Deep boo.

Laura: Well, thank you very much for teaching me, Ron.

Laura: I've had a smashing time.

Ron: Thank you for learning, Laura.

Laura: Thank you for being my brother, Ron.

Ron: That's okay.

Laura: No, thanks for being here.

Ron: Thanks.

Ron: I've got three.

Laura: It's fine.

Laura: So there you go.

Laura: Who'd have thought in an episode all about cancer, raggedy would be the most terrifying thing we discussed?

Ron: I think that there's going to be a broad wave of support from I.

Laura: Think a lot of people are going to have had to Google him to find it.

Laura: Rupert the bear is so retro and he hasn't had that come around and be cool again moment.

Ron: No.

Ron: Because there's nothing to him.

Laura: No.

Ron: And there are several other iconic British bears.

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: Paddington and poo.

Laura: Just s*** all over.

Ron: But nothing compares to raggedy.

Laura: I'm going to get you a raggedy toy.

Laura: There must be someone on Etsy that's making raggedy toys really horrific.

Ron: It's like the min pins.

Laura: Don Minnie used to scare that crap.

Ron: Out of me when I was a kid.

Ron: Little Billy, what are you up to in there?

Laura: I'm being good, mother.

Ron: Terrific.

Laura: And then the devil starts talking to him.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: And the thing is where host of the podcast, Laura Lexx and I grew up, it's like a country, like old farmhouse, and then there's just fields from that point onwards, like it's on the edge of the village that we're from.

Ron: And I could so vividly picture little Billy sat at the window because it's just trees and green.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: Dining room window, mum in the kitchen.

Ron: Little Billy, what are you up to in this?

Ron: And I could see the f****** devil man tempting me outside.

Laura: You always were outside as a kid, though.

Ron: You were out there digging for the devil.

Ron: Got to get to his house, get rid of it.

Laura: Excavating that thing.

Ron: The weird end to the episode.

Ron: Now I'm really stressed.

Laura: Well, there we go.

Laura: Was it Ron's worst episode ever?

Laura: Not as a performance, but as for the psychological damage that he's taken.

Laura: So, hey, we love you very much.

Laura: Thanks for listening.

Laura: If you want a bit more of us and to help us financially support the podcast, go to patreon.

Laura: ComLexxeducation.

Laura: And if you can't afford that, we absolutely know money is tight for a lot of people.

Laura: Hey, leave us a review somewhere or spread the word.

Laura: Retweet things.

Laura: Let's just get as many listeners as we can so that we're the next big, hot, sexy thing.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: And if you want more incentive to financially help us, know that I've not put a bean into this podcast.

Ron: So it's all come from Laura.

Ron: One person is shouldering the costs and she'd like some help.

Laura: Hey, it's fine.

Laura: But, hey, we want to give you more things and build the team.

Laura: We love you, though.

Laura: And we'll see you next week when.

Ron: It'S chemistry cluster Smith, your raggedy Janets.

Laura: Hello.

Laura: And you've got the noisy chair headed.

Ron: For of years and years as well.

Laura: You are the worst.