McDeath

 Laura: Hello and welcome to another brand new, sparkling episode of Lexx Education.

The crowd goes wild.

Laura: The science podcast where me, comedian Laura Lexx tries to learn science from my real life brother Ron.

Ron: Hello! It's me, brother Ron.

Laura: It is Brother Ron, the king of backing out of catchphrases. How are you doing this week, Ron?

Ron: I'm good. I'm on holiday in Vienna.cI've read 100 pages of my book in, like, three days.cI've eaten lots of Caesar crime, I've eaten lots of Labour CASER.cI've discovered something called kafabonin, which is the most delicious beans you've ever eaten in your life.

Laura: I want some of these beans.

Ron: It's like a specific way of preparing them, but it's done with, like, pumpkin oil and apple cider vinegar and it’s MWAH.

Laura: That sounds good

Ron: It’s real good.

Laura: I went to a safari park type zoo type thing yesterday and saw lots of really good animals and rode on a lot of ride.

Laura: I rode on a ride Ron which I think has the best pun name I've ever been on.

Ron: Ooh… um, uh…

Laura: I don't think you'll guess it.

Ron: No, tell me.

Laura: So the ride, right on those ones where you're on a flat surface and you kind of go round in a circle and then look around.

Ron: Yeah, I know this guy.

Ron: And they always have, like, an airbrush picture of Michael Jackson behind him or something.

Laura: Well, not this time, Ron, because the thing we were in was a bus, right?

Laura: But shaped like a hippopotamus.

Laura: A hippopotaBUS.

Ron: That's good.

Ron: I like that because it's not like these things are always buses and it's a theme on that.

Ron: They've had to go two steps and they had to make it a bus and then make it a hippopota bus.

Laura: Yeah, it was very good.

Laura: It was a lot of fun.

Laura: I had a very good time.

Laura: And I saw my favourite animal the whole way around was the Colubus monkey.

Ron: Which ones are those guys?

Laura: They're like a black and white type dude.

Laura: And there was a young one, which when we went round the first time.

Ron: They'Ve got, like cowboy cowboy fringes on.

Laura: Their sleeves, which looks a lot like a dress that I own and wear, and I was delighted.

Laura: Sometimes you see those tweet threads that's like Sarah Millican has teapots, etc, etc.

Laura: And I'm like, Man, I might make it my life's mission now to buy dresses that are sort of like monkeys in the hope that someone will do a thread of Laurel Lexus monkeys.

Ron: They've got kind of a demure sort of Moira Rose vibe.

Laura: Oh, they're wonderful.

Laura: And when we first went round, the sort of child one was playing with its mum and they were like really faux wrestling.

Laura: Like this kid was like, I'm going to get you.

Laura: And then the mom would just stick one arm out and be like, yeah, okay, kid, no.

Laura: And then when we went back around in the evening, they were all just lying down together and the little one was nursing and they were sitting like a little family and it was so beautiful, Ron.

Laura: I loved them also I rode a sloth on a carousel and it was.

Ron: Favourite thing about your bottle, it was so hot.

Ron: That's a common oh, you did two tweets about it.

Ron: That is sweet.

Laura: I did one tweet because there was a typo in the first one so I deleted it.

Laura: I saw it twice a thanks for liking it.

Laura: Neither time.

Ron: Didn't like it that much.

Laura: You're not a very nice boy.

Laura: Anyway.

Laura: Right, today's episode, we've got some thank yous to do that's animal catch up.

Laura: Thank you to Podsbike.

Laura: Hello, Podspike.

Laura: Dan and Studio at Podsburg are wonderful as people.

Laura: You might have found us through one of our little infographic trailer clip things that I studiously put out all the time.

Laura: Dan and Suji helped us make those.

Laura: So our illustrations were done by Matthew Grant from the Noise next door.

Laura: Cheque them out.

Laura: Wonderful comedy geniuses.

Laura: But then Dan and Suji turned them into templates that we could use to attract your attention and make you listen to our nonsense.

Laura: So if you want some help in marketing your podcast, then please turn to Pod Spike.

Ron: He also got us into Pod Bible and most recently, the Guardian.

Laura: Yes, we're a guardian.

Ron: By us at waitress.

Laura: My bomb is Calamari.

Ron: You can't take a confident sip after saying that.

Ron: Like I'm going to.

Ron: Yes.

Ron: And some banter out of calamari.

Ron: A*******.

Laura: You should get on the hyperpart bus.

Laura: We have a new review on the Apple.

Laura: Thank you very much for our first state side review.

Laura: Dave, you legend.

Ron: How are you, Dave?

Laura: Hi, Dave.

Laura: Thanks for giving us a five star review.

Laura: And the title is just Laura is a star brackets f***, Ron.

Laura: Brackets that I've added.

Laura: And Dave says great idea to mix comedy with science.

Laura: We need Laura to visit the States.

Laura: Oh, can you imagine Ron if we did a live version of his podcast but just not even bothered with the straight to America.

Ron: Not even bothered with the science, apparently.

Ron: Just you having a Netflix special.

Laura: Let's move to La.

Laura: Ron.

Laura: Let's become La kids.

Ron: That sounds awful.

Laura: Yes, I think we would be too hot.

Ron: We're too fat and ugly.

Ron: We would not get up.

Laura: Hey, I'm well up for lip fillers though.

Laura: Let's do it on social media this week.

Laura: We've been discussing nicknames for your listenership as a whole.

Laura: What do you want to be called?

Laura: Listeners are So boring.

Laura: Fans fills up our own calamari rings.

Laura: So we've suggestions so far from people have been lab Rats, the Swamp Brains, explorers, experts.

Laura: What do you think the Coalition of Peeps should be called?

Ron: Yeah, I want to give a special shout out to Avertoski for Lester Curricula as one of the puns.

Laura: Great.

Laura: I think if we do ever get around to doing anything on Patreon lecture, curricula will be the name of the extra podcast or whatever we end up doing.

Laura: Yeah, yeah.

Laura: There's also been quite a lot of requests for merch this week, which I'm not sure if we're quite there with a big enough listenership for merch, but, hey, when we are, don't worry about it.

Laura: We've definitely got some catchphrases now.

Laura: Jeff is playing episode catch up.

Laura: Jeff wants to know if we want to do a Down Survivor script for people that survived listening to that episode.

Laura: I don't know if we can advertise that.

Laura: After, like, seven episodes of our podcast, people wanted a survivors group made.

Laura: Is that good marketing?

Laura: Hey, podsbike, let us know.

Laura: We've had another experiment suggestion.

Laura: What was this one about Ron burning a flake?

Ron: Really?

Ron: I was in a museum.

Ron: I was in a museum called The Albertina in a Picasso and Monet exhibition.

Ron: Just sat in the corner watching gay burn a flake.

Ron: And the weirdest part is that the reason why it was of interest is that the flake didn't melt, it just set fire.

Ron: It never occurred to me while I was watching it, why are they doing this?

Laura: So we'll put that on the list, though.

Laura: It's on the list of experiments to be done.

Laura: Now, we're going back a few weeks here with this last thing that someone mentioned this week.

Laura: John on Twitter is also playing episode catch up.

Laura: I don't know if you remember quite early doors, we discussed Ron's neighbour leaving a poo in a bag in a communal hallway.

Laura: A dog poo.

Laura: That's true, actually.

Laura: John said, and it blew my mind.

Laura: He said, Why would you bag it?

Laura: If it happened in a flat?

Laura: Why wouldn't you just flush it?

Laura: And it's honestly the first time in two years of having a dog and collecting up her boots from the garden and bagging them and binning them that it's ever occurred to me to just flush them.

Ron: Have you started flushing them now?

Laura: Yes.

Ron: You must be saving on bags.

Ron: Bags on bags.

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: So, thank you, John.

Laura: You've blown my world right over.

Laura: I can flush dog poops just the.

Ron: Same as the rest of them.

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: So you guys have really had a busy week.

Laura: Thank you very much.

Laura: We'll jump into the episode now.

Laura: This week we're back to physics wurf.

Laura: It's like energy constants.

Laura: That's what we're doing.

Ron: Energy transfers.

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: Have a good time.

Laura: Hello, Ron.

Ron: Hello.

Laura: It's Physics Day.

Ron: It is Physics day for the listener.

Ron: I was just telling Laura that I made a booboo in the horrible physics lesson that we did last time.

Ron: We did that slightly out of order.

Ron: So for probably music to Laura's ears, we are doing a different topic in science, physics today.

Laura: It was all that ball rolling last time, wasn't it?

Laura: It annoyed me so much.

Laura: Annoyed me mainly about that it's I got out of that episode and I went downstairs and I was like, oh, Tom, you know, because one stronger pretend is real.

Laura: And then I explained it to Tom and he just went, yeah, that sounds about right.

Laura: I was like, yeah, because it is right.

Laura: Not, though.

Laura: Is it like, logically.

Laura: I understand it's probably right theoretically, but it isn't right logically.

Laura: Do you know what I mean?

Laura: Like an ant isn't bounced.

Laura: Anyway, I'm not getting back into this.

Laura: If we're not doing it, we're not doing it.

Laura: Brilliant.

Laura: I'm glad they've cut it from the syllabus.

Ron: No, it will come back.

Ron: It will come back and we will revisit it.

Ron: We may just do that lesson again.

Laura: With a Zen open mind towards physics.

Ron: So what I've done today, because we talked about systems again, I've translated it all into stuff that, you know, and like great.

Laura: The While You Were Sleeping.

Laura: Guide to physics.

Ron: Exactly.

Ron: So, first we're talking about energy transfers within a system.

Ron: Okay?

Laura: Okay.

Ron: The first thing it wants us to know is that we can calculate energy changes when a temperature changes and how much energy it takes to change the temperature or something.

Ron: So we have an equation for that.

Laura: It just instantly makes me want to get up and walk around the room and do something else.

Ron: Thanks.

Laura: Not you.

Laura: You're a nice boy.

Laura: It's just sad, isn't it?

Ron: So we have an equation.

Ron: Delta E equals Mcdelta.

Laura: Theta delta E equals Mcdelta.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: So do you know what delta means in this context?

Laura: No.

Laura: Energy to make up a funny thing about it, either.

Ron: Do you know how to draw delta?

Laura: No.

Ron: What have you written down there?

Ron: What notes were you just making?

Ron: Did you just scribble on the page and pretend?

Laura: No.

Laura: I wrote de equals McDonough delta Echo.

Laura: What did you say?

Ron: Delta E.

Ron: That's a f****** D delta.

Laura: Yeah, it's D for Delta.

Laura: D for delta e equals M C delta theatre.

Ron: No.

Ron: So, right, a delta is a triangle.

Ron: It's the fourth letter.

Laura: A triangle, then.

Ron: No, it's the fourth letter, the Greek alphabet.

Laura: Am I Greek?

Ron: Triangle, triangle, capital E.

Ron: When you were talking about energy, it's always a capital E of E equals MC squared.

Ron: Fame.

Ron: Just a little M.

Ron: Well, you just.

Laura: Said it was always a capital no, I didn't.

Ron: I said it's always a capital E when we're talking about energy.

Laura: Why wouldn't you formalise that across all those letters?

Ron: Because capital M and little M mean different things.

Laura: Jesus Christ.

Laura: I hate it.

Laura: Wrong.

Laura: I'm so angry.

Laura: We've only been recording two minutes.

Laura: You and I just had an hour long meeting and it was lovely just chatting nicely.

Laura: And then you start telling me about this and I want to squash your little head against a wall until you stop talking to me started.

Ron: So I'll finish a little C.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: And then another triangle for delta.

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: And then theta looks like a zero with a line through it.

Laura: Great.

Laura: F****** art class.

Laura: Cool.

Laura: That makes as much sense to me as what I'd written down.

Laura: Deeque was Mcdeff.

Ron: Yes.

Ron: But it's f****** right now, so now we can move on.

Ron: Delta is the fourth letter of the Greek alphabet in this context, when it's a capital Delta, which is what the triangle is.

Laura: You can hear what you're saying, right?

Laura: It's so stupid.

Laura: Capital Delta is different to the tiny Delta.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: Like all letters, it's just a letter.

Laura: No, capital M is the same as a baby M.

Laura: You're not like M or they're the same.

Ron: Yes, but in formulas, they mean different things.

Laura: Why don't you just make different shapes, then?

Ron: They have they're called letters.

Ron: They're all different.

Ron: The E looks different to the C, which looks different to a Delta.

Laura: But why have a capital M and a small M have an M and then draw, like, a big circle with a small circle in the middle and spikes coming out the side.

Ron: Right, okay.

Ron: So, Laura, you saying that if I was sat here today teaching you this and it was actually Bongoe, which calls MC Bongo Peter, you'd be like, oh, great job, Bongo.

Ron: I am happy learning about this shape.

Ron: You have to be saying that.

Laura: Well, I just don't think I should no, I'd still be having a horrible time because it's horrible and stupid.

Laura: I just don't think you should be laughing at me for writing down de.

Laura: If someone says to me, delta Ebim, or whatever it was you said, how the h*** do I know that Delta is a triangle?

Ron: Delta ebin.

Laura: What was it?

Laura: E for?

Ron: Energy.

Ron: It's a capital E for energy.

Laura: Right, cool.

Laura: The triangle energy.

Ron: M, C, triangle theatre.

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: Okay.

Ron: Delta in this context means change.

Ron: So when you say Delta E, that means change in energy.

Ron: Change.

Ron: Okay.

Ron: How much is the energy changing by?

Ron: Okay, M stands for the mass of the thing that we're heating or cooling.

Ron: C is something called the specific heat constant.

Ron: That basically just means how much energy does it take to heat that thing as a constant?

Ron: And then we've got delta theatre.

Ron: That is the change in temperature.

Laura: Okay, if you say so, my boy.

Ron: So get your calculator out.

Ron: We're going to calculate the amount of energy it takes for you to make two cups of tea.

Laura: I'd love a cup of tea.

Ron: Yeah, see, you love tea.

Laura: Yeah, but it just happens.

Laura: I've had loads of tea without knowing how to do the energy for it.

Laura: Why did I pick my phone up?

Laura: I'm on Twitter.

Ron: You need to calculate it.

Laura: Oh, calculator later.

Laura: Another s***** email.

Laura: And they're like, are you even going to offer to help replace yourself?

Laura: No, for the same reason that if you had to pull the gig, you wouldn't then scurry around finding me a different gig for that Friday night.

Laura: We just have different jobs, mate.

Laura: That one isn't mine.

Ron: When I call in sick to work, I don't go, Mine.

Ron: Noah's going to step in.

Laura: And I get it, it's not great to pull out on somebody's gig, but you've got a couple of weeks to replace me and I've said sorry, and there's nothing I can do about it.

Laura: Anyway, I've got a calculator now.

Ron: Okay, cool.

Ron: So we're going to boil enough water for two cups of tea.

Laura: It would be quite funny to send Noah to your job, though.

Laura: Ron's got a friend called Noah who is so delightfully, brilliantly, crazily intelligent and then dopey he's excellent.

Laura: I reckon he would do your job for a day.

Laura: He's the sort of person if you just friend and went, no, you just go to work for me.

Laura: Be like, yeah, okay.

Laura: And everyone would love him.

Ron: Yeah.

Laura: He used to live with orangutans he did, anyway.

Ron: He said it was like studying the deck chairs on the Titanic.

Ron: Yikes.

Laura: Let's not talk about that.

Laura: I'm sad enough about climate change this week.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: Anyhow, right, so we are heating enough water for two cups of tea.

Laura: Okay, great.

Ron: So the average mug is 330 mil, so we're going to call that 330 grammes.

Ron: Okay, sure.

Ron: The water is starting at room temperature, 21.

Ron: Write this down.

Laura: You said to get my calculator out.

Laura: I'm holding my calculator.

Ron: Write this down.

Laura: Oh, my God.

Laura: What am I writing?

Laura: I've got a mug, two mugs.

Ron: Two mugs worth of water, 330 millilitres, which for today, we're just going to say it's 330 grammes.

Laura: 330 grammes times two of water.

Ron: Yes.

Ron: The water is at room temperature when we start, so 21 deg.

Laura: Okay.

Laura: At start.

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: And the specific heat constant of water is 4185.5.

Laura: 4185.5 is the heat constant of water.

Ron: How much energy does it take to boil that water?

Laura: I f****** don't know and I don't care.

Laura: Why does it make me so angry?

Laura: It makes me physically want to be mean to you, that you're trying to make me understand this.

Laura: The other subjects don't do this.

Laura: I love that this podcast is accidentally going to develop three quite separate strains of episodes where it's like, oh, we might actually learn something in biology.

Laura: In chemistry, they'll have a nice chat about the world, and then in physics, just too furiously frustrated people trying to get through 45 minutes.

Ron: And I've said this before, if we don't get through it, there is going to be just a string of physics episodes once we're finished with the other two.

Laura: All right, so is that all the information I get?

Ron: That's all the information you need.

Laura: Right, okay, let me think.

Laura: So the triangle.

Ron: The triangle means change, so we are working out delta e, so we don't need to worry about that for now.

Ron: We just need to worry about the Mcdelta theta.

Ron: Okay?

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: So I've given you the C.

Ron: The C is the specific heat constant, right?

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: M is the mass.

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: So how much mass have we got?

Laura: 660.

Ron: But in all formulas, we use the si unit.

Ron: The si unit of mass is kilogrammes, not grammes.

Ron: So m in this will be.

Laura: Divide it by 1000.

Ron: Yeah, perfect.

Ron: Okay.

Ron: And what's the boiling temperature of the boiling point of water?

Laura: 100.

Ron: Yes.

Ron: So how much is the temperature changing by?

Laura: 100.

Ron: No, try again.

Laura: What are you talking about?

Laura: What?

Ron: How much is the temperature changing by?

Laura: What?

Ron: The water that we're boiling.

Ron: We're starting at room temperature 21 degrees.

Ron: We're f****** boiling it to 100.

Ron: How much is it changing?

Ron: How much?

Laura: Just under five times five degrees.

Ron: Why does your brain work like that?

Laura: What do you mean?

Laura: That's logical.

Laura: How much are we getting?

Laura: It five times hotter.

Ron: That is a baffling way for your brain to work.

Laura: Is it?

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: How much hotter is it getting?

Ron: 79 degrees hotter?

Laura: Yes.

Laura: Five times ish all right.

Laura: 79 degrees.

Laura: Okay.

Ron: How much energy.

Laura: Point 66.

Laura: 79.

Laura: Now, do I need to put that constant heat somewhere?

Laura: Okay.

Ron: It's so hot.

Laura: Do I need to do anything with this constant heat number?

Ron: No, I told you that for fun.

Laura: Yeah, it's not kind.

Ron: Do you remember when we were doing formulas before?

Laura: No.

Ron: We worked out how much gravitational potential energy and stuff had.

Laura: No, I don't remember that.

Laura: That might be before I got my notepad.

Laura: I don't know where the notes for that are totipotent no, I don't have any notes on that.

Ron: So do you honestly not know how an equation works?

Laura: I'm not doing an equation.

Ron: This is an equation.

Laura: How is this an equation?

Ron: Delta e equals MC.

Ron: Delta theta is an equation.

Laura: Yeah, I only understand the equals.

Ron: When things are just next to each other in an equation like that, you multiply them together.

Laura: You can't times a c by a triangle.

Ron: No, that's why they've got numerical f****** values.

Laura: What was that?

Laura: Oh, I see.

Laura: Oh, no, I should have had breakfast.

Laura: That's why this is hard.

Laura: So 79 times triangle times theta.

Ron: No, times triangle because triangle means the change in triangle means the change in delta.

Ron: Theta is one entity in this how.

Laura: The f*** are you supposed to know that?

Laura: This is the problem is that you're laughing at me like you don't know you've got to times them together and then I times them all together and you go, oh, except for if you're a billy goat and then those don't times together because those are the same and a partnership.

Ron: Yes, but Laura, I know that you also can't blame me for not expecting you to have the brain equivalent of one of those pencils where you push them in the end and then the other one falls out the other side.

Ron: We talked earlier about how delta means the changing and then that entity is the change in the temperature.

Laura: So you need another sign then between the MC and the triangle so that you know to stop timing.

Ron: No, because you have idea object permanence.

Ron: As soon as we stop talking about it, it's just gone.

Ron: Because if you just know that delta means the change in and it goes before the thing and then change in energy, change in temperature, fine.

Ron: If you just know that and then sort of juggle two bits of information at once, then you're fine.

Laura: So the whole sum is just point 66 times 79.

Ron: No, because the C is there as well.

Laura: I thought the C was the 79 bit.

Ron: No, Delta Theatre change in temperature, it went up by 79 degrees.

Laura: I am so confused about what we're doing.

Laura: Then.

Ron: M is the mass.

Ron: Yeah, that's right.

Laura: What would you say?

Ron: The specific heat constant for water.

Laura: So we do need that.

Laura: Yes.

Laura: I asked if I needed the C.

Laura: I was taking the pit.

Ron: Why would we not need it?

Ron: Why would I have mentioned it?

Ron: Why would it be there if we didn't need it?

Ron: Formulas don't come with supplementary information.

Ron: It's not worth this out.

Ron: And, oh, by the way, the specific heat cooks in the water is 4185.5.

Ron: Isn't that a nice little tidbit?

Ron: Work it out on your way.

Ron: Why would it be like that?

Laura: Why is any of it like it is?

Laura: I hate this so much.

Ron: Multiply the three f****** numbers together.

Laura: Shouting at me.

Laura: Why are we multiplying the three together?

Ron: Three M times C times delta theta.

Laura: You said we didn't times the triangle.

Ron: Not the triangle.

Ron: Delta Theatre is one f****** entity.

Laura: Right, let's put that in a bracket, then.

Ron: Okay, that works.

Laura: Okay.

Laura: No, that doesn't work.

Ron: Yes, it does, because you do all.

Laura: The stuff in the bracket first.

Laura: Even I know that the stuff in.

Ron: The bracket is just the number 79.

Laura: Why don't we just write 79 there?

Ron: Because you need to book.

Laura: We could.

Ron: We could.

Ron: We can.

Ron: We will.

Ron: Write it down.

Ron: Write down 79.

Ron: Write it down.

Ron: Write down 79.

Laura: I've written it down loads of times and every time it's been wrong.

Laura: It was wrong when it was 66 times 79.

Ron: 66 times 79 times 4185.5.

Laura: This is so stupid.

Laura: I could have made tea by now.

Laura: This is the worst science, because nobody's got tea, nobody's happy, and this is utterly pointless.

Laura: What a headache.

Laura: 218,231.97.

Ron: Well done.

Laura: Is that right?

Ron: Yes, that is correct.

Laura: What does that mean?

Ron: That is how much energy it has taken to heat up, to boil the water in our kettle for our cup of tea jewels in Jules.

Ron: Yes.

Laura: Yes.

Laura: Okay, nice.

Ron: Okay, so the next thing that we're going to learn about is power.

Laura: Cool.

Ron: Power is defined as the rate at which energy is transferred to or the rate at which work is done.

Ron: Okay, so literally, I really think that.

Laura: Should be the end of the episode.

Laura: Ron, I want to go and have a small cry.

Ron: No, you're fine.

Ron: So, literally, we just take the energy and then we divide it by the time that it took to do that.

Ron: Okay, so for our kettle, let's say that it took two and a half minutes to boil.

Laura: Oh, I'm getting a new kettle then.

Laura: That is too long to wait.

Laura: 218, two, three 1.97 divided by 2.5.

Ron: But again, we need the Si unit for time, which is seconds.

Laura: 100 and 5200 and 18.

Laura: I don't like numbers with commas in them.

Laura: I don't know how to say them out loud.

Laura: 1454.8, 798.

Ron: Correct.

Laura: Powers.

Ron: What?

Laura: I don't know.

Ron: No.

Laura: What the power?

Laura: There was a horrible moment there where you would just go, what?

Laura: And I was like, he wants a word and I don't know what the word is going to be.

Laura: And then I'm in trouble.

Ron: So our castle is 1454 watt kettle.

Laura: Great.

Laura: Is that helpful?

Laura: What does that do?

Laura: Who cares about that?

Ron: So now we're going to talk about conservation and dissipation of energy.

Laura: Constipation.

Ron: Conservation.

Ron: Conservation and dissipation of energy.

Ron: Energy can be transferred, usefully stored or dissipated, but it cannot be created or destroyed.

Ron: Okay.

Laura: Unless you're a god.

Ron: No.

Ron: Even them, no.

Ron: Students should be able to describe with examples where there are energy transfers in a closed system that there is no net change to the total energy.

Ron: So a closed system is a theoretical thing that we use in physics to help us describe situations.

Ron: It's kind of like when we talked about having point objects or frictionless surfaces and stuff like that.

Ron: Are you painting your nails?

Laura: No, I'm putting moisturiser on with a glue spreader.

Ron: Are you all right?

Laura: It feels nice and you scrape it back off again.

Laura: I'm listening.

Laura: You can dissipate conservate and move, but.

Ron: What is a closed system?

Laura: Like CCTV?

Laura: No, it's a science thing.

Laura: It's a science experiment that you guys like.

Laura: Is that what you said?

Laura: You said something about a science thing.

Ron: It's a theoretical don't crack your knuckles.

Laura: It's threatening.

Ron: It's a theoretical thing that you use pay attention.

Laura: I am.

Ron: It's a theoretical thing that we use in physics to simplify things.

Laura: Life doesn't simplify anything.

Laura: I bet it makes it all worse.

Ron: It's like having a frictionless surface.

Ron: It can't exist in real life, but it simplifies the calculations we need to do.

Ron: So a closed system just means that no energy is leaving or entering.

Ron: Okay, now we've had our cup of tea.

Laura: We haven't that we boiled.

Ron: It was lovely.

Ron: Now we're going to Tar Steps with our family.

Ron: So we've put some apple in.

Laura: 99% of the listeners will have just gone, what Tar Steps?

Laura: So Tar Steps is a place in Devon or Somerset.

Laura: I don't know if it's over the border.

Laura: It's a river, basically, with a little crossing, and you can go there and swim.

Ron: And it's got a Stone Age bridge.

Laura: That's true afford, too, isn't it?

Laura: Because you can drive through that bit of it.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: So we've had a cup of tea and we're going to Tar Steps with our family.

Ron: So we're going to put some apple and mango J, two o's in a cool bag with some ice pants not.

Laura: Go with our family then?

Laura: Because there's no way they've sprung for J Two picnic.

Laura: We've got fruit shoots at best, and we're f****** grateful.

Ron: What are the energy transfers going on inside the Cool Bag?

Ron: For now, we are assuming that the Cool Bag is a closed system.

Ron: Okay?

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: Okay.

Ron: So we've got some room temperature J Two O's, some chilli, chilly cold ice packs.

Ron: We're putting them into a Cool Bag together.

Ron: Can you try and describe the energy transfers that are going on inside that Callback?

Laura: I like your questions.

Laura: And now, like, can you describe can you try and describe you don't have to get it right.

Laura: Can you try some words?

Ron: Just give it a go.

Laura: So, Triangle E, there will be a.

Ron: Change in energy of certain things, but not of the system itself.

Ron: Because as we're talking about, is a closed system in the bag?

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: What has the most energy?

Laura: The juice.

Laura: It's got sugar in it.

Ron: Let's talk temperatures, because we're cooling the J two O's down, aren't we?

Ron: By putting them in the Cool Bag.

Laura: I think you'd have had them in the fridge anyway, to be honest.

Ron: They were out on the counter in the utility.

Laura: Then we f***** up because it's a.

Ron: Long drive from mom and dad to dust them.

Ron: They'll be fine.

Laura: But those packs are for maintaining a cold temperature, not cheap.

Ron: Yeah, we f***** it.

Ron: It's all okay.

Ron: We've got ice packs coming out.

Ron: The yingyang is all right.

Laura: Okay.

Laura: What do you want me to say?

Laura: I don't everybody knows it's going cold, isn't it?

Ron: So describe the energy transfer.

Ron: Where is the heat energy going?

Laura: Whichever direction the J two O's are.

Ron: In, it's not going towards the J two O's.

Laura: Yeah, the cold energy is getting in the J two O's and the heat energy.

Ron: Okay, cool.

Ron: Today we go we've dredged up something from the swamp of your mind.

Ron: There's no such thing as cold energy.

Ron: Cold is the lack of heat.

Ron: So where is the energy flowing to?

Laura: What do you mean?

Laura: What?

Ron: There's heat energy in the J 20.

Ron: The J 20 is cooling down.

Ron: So do you accept that heat energy is leaving the J 20?

Laura: If that's what it takes to finish this, fine.

Laura: No, that sounds stupid.

Laura: Cold is getting in the J 20.

Laura: Otherwise you're putting J two O's in to heat the ice packs up.

Laura: And that isn't what we're talking about.

Ron: That is exactly what we're talking about.

Laura: That just feels so cruel to the ice packs.

Laura: Then they think that they've got this job to do, but actually they're not doing anything.

Laura: They're just having stuff done to them.

Laura: They're like sacrifices.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: They're taking in heat energy not only from the J two O's, but also from the air inside the Callback.

Ron: They'll take in energy from these?

Laura: Oh, no.

Laura: I just feel sad for them.

Ron: Students should be able to describe with examples how in.

Ron: All system changes, energy is dissipated so that it is stored in less useful ways.

Ron: This energy is often described as being wasted.

Ron: So, for example, if we have a car that's driving along, the car that's taking us to tar steps, that engine is burning fuel to move it along, but then it's also creating a lot of heat.

Ron: The engine gets hot.

Ron: Right.

Ron: So that heat energy is waste energy.

Ron: Right?

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: I know when you're doing a fake year.

Laura: Yes, Ron.

Laura: Yes.

Ron: So let's think about our cool bag in the real world.

Ron: Where is the waste energy?

Ron: Where's the energy coming in?

Laura: The zip.

Ron: Through the bag?

Ron: Yeah.

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: Is that okay?

Ron: All right, let's wrap this off.

Ron: How could we improve our cool bag?

Laura: Nice, colourful one is always good, so you know which is yours?

Laura: Quite unique.

Laura: I don't like the solid ones that when you're trying to walk along with them, they bash your knees.

Laura: I like a soft, cool bag.

Laura: You're easier to pack in the car as well, because you can, like, put stuff around.

Laura: Do you remember that one that mom and dad had that you could plug into the car?

Ron: That's right, Laura.

Ron: More insulation would fix up or maybe some bigger better.

Ron: Now, Laura, the thermal conductivity of the material we use for the insulation, do you think that we want it to be very thermally conductive or not very thermally conductive.

Laura: Not conductive.

Laura: I wouldn't want a copper cool bag.

Ron: Exactly.

Ron: Well done, Laura.

Laura: I know about copper because of saucepans.

Ron: What part of this system that we're describing do you think we would want something with high thermal conductivity?

Ron: That's right, Laura.

Ron: The iPAX and the JQO fiddling with your AirPods.

Laura: I was thinking it's not AirPods.

Laura: I don't have air pods.

Laura: I would have lost them instantly.

Laura: It's just this plug.

Ron: It is just a plug.

Laura: I concentrate better when I'm fiddling with things.

Ron: That's it.

Ron: That's the end.

Laura: I said it.

Ron: Yeah, well done.

Ron: I said well done.

Laura: Don't say well done like you're not happy with me.

Ron: I'm happy with you.

Laura: You are so much like dad.

Laura: It is just sad.

Ron: So that's the end of the lesson.

Laura: God.

Laura: And we've just not learned anything.

Laura: It was all pointless.

Laura: It was so stupid.

Laura: We haven't got any tea, we haven't been on a day out.

Laura: We've got nothing.

Laura: All I know is that the kettle is like, 1454 watts.

Laura: I don't even know what the point of that is.

Ron: So you know how much power it's using?

Laura: Who cares?

Laura: I'll know when I get my electricity bill.

Ron: Yeah, but you might care after what.

Laura: We should do about that.

Ron: So if you saw something that had, like, a lower wattage, you'd go, oh, that's using less energy.

Laura: Yeah, but maybe it takes longer to make my tea.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: So, like, for tea, ketchup was maybe not the best for, like, light bulbs.

Laura: But maybe they put out less light.

Ron: Well, they probably wouldn't I mean, that's a s*** light bulb.

Laura: So if I've got a lower wattage light bulb using less energy but how do I know that it's putting out the same amount of light with your f****** eyes?

Laura: Yeah, well, I'm wondering about being cute looking at the shelves.

Laura: I don't know that.

Ron: Well, they go back and put it in, and then if it's still dark after you turn it on, go back to being queue.

Ron: I'm sorry, doesn't work.

Ron: It's still dark in my house after I plug this light bulb in.

Ron: Another one, please.

Laura: Just because you raking in your Brussels money and you've got enough money to buy three light bulbs and return them, all this was useless.

Laura: Thanks for wasting my day teaching me this garbage.

Laura: I'll see you in a week for the quiz.

Laura: All right.

Laura: So, quiz time.

Laura: A physics quiz.

Laura: I can't see how this can possibly go wrong.

Ron: Why on earth did you start doing that while I was taking a slow drink of water?

Laura: I just like to catch you out so people know that you're not professional.

Laura: And it's been two weeks because we had last week off, didn't we?

Laura: So it's been forever since we even.

Laura: Oh, God.

Laura: I'm looking at my notes from last week and they make no bloody sense.

Laura: It's just a load of triangles.

Ron: Well, that brings us onto question number one.

Laura: S***.

Ron: Can you please write down the formula?

Ron: Delta E equals Mcdelta theta.

Laura: It's still written down in my notes from last time.

Laura: So does that count?

Ron: Yeah, that's wonderful.

Ron: It's just you need that formula to complete the question.

Laura: Oh, s***.

Laura: Okay.

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: So triangle big E equals small MC, triangle Jupiter or Saturn really, isn't it?

Ron: Yeah, much more.

Ron: Okay.

Laura: It's planets.

Laura: A science.

Ron: Yes.

Ron: Astronomy.

Ron: That comes under physics, usually.

Laura: Will we do that?

Laura: That would spice up physics if we did a load of planet stuff.

Ron: Yeah, but I think we just see the seesaw of interest tipsy.

Ron: I won't give a s***.

Laura: Okay.

Laura: All right.

Ron: You know how you're like, this stuff is too small?

Ron: Why do we care about it?

Ron: I have the same thing.

Ron: That stuff is well far away.

Laura: I feel the same.

Laura: Space is too big and too far away.

Laura: Too cold.

Laura: Stop poking it.

Laura: Leave it alone.

Laura: That's how I feel about space.

Ron: Bigness, I think is a good thing.

Ron: And the bigness of the Sun, I'm like, Whoa, so big.

Ron: And it's not that far away.

Ron: But like Jupiter, other galaxies, black holes, couldn't care less.

Ron: Really?

Laura: No.

Laura: Too big, too far away, too cold.

Laura: That's how I felt, anyway.

Ron: I put a 1.5 litre bottle of room temperature water into a freezer.

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: To freeze it so that I can make an ice pack.

Ron: Because I'm going to a mainstream day out tomorrow.

Laura: Wonderful.

Ron: Room temperature is 21 deg.

Laura: Okay.

Ron: How much energy leaves the bottle when we freeze it?

Laura: What are you fiddling with?

Laura: It's very annoying.

Laura: Stop fiddling.

Ron: I'm not Fiddling.

Ron: I'm Googling Something.

Laura: Oh, My God.

Laura: And I've got to work that out with triangles.

Ron: Room temperature is 21 degrees.

Laura: Yeah, I've written that down.

Laura: Oh, Lord.

Laura: What Is Happening, Ron?

Laura: I've Got No Idea.

Laura: Why Is that?

Laura: Why don't you try six?

Ron: Break down.

Laura: I am.

Ron: What the formula is.

Laura: I Am 1.5 Litres.

Laura: Is that of the SR unit.

Laura: Ron.

Laura: What's the Si Unit of Water?

Ron: Very Close si Unit.

Laura: I thought I was being, well, clever remembering to ask that.

Ron: No.

Laura: What Is It?

Ron: Because we need mass, isn't it?

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: So litre is a measure of water volume.

Laura: Change It Into Grammes.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: For our purposes, let's just say one litre of water weighs one kilogramme of water.

Laura: So I've got 15 kilogrammes of water?

Ron: Yes.

Ron: Which is actually in the SIU.

Ron: Now.

Ron: I don't know why I was being so mysterious.

Laura: Let's just say it's roughly.

Laura: Oh, how did I trip over the right answer?

Laura: But Kilogrammes isn't the Si unit, is it?

Ron: Yeah.

Laura: Okay, so that's the mass, and then we multiply.

Laura: Why have I got Mac death written down?

Laura: Why are none of my notes helpful?

Laura: How can you make a page full of notes and none of it mean anything?

Ron: So what do you think C is?

Laura: Well, I've written down that C is the heat constant.

Ron: C is the heat constant.

Laura: Have a point for that.

Ron: Stands for Constant.

Ron: Okay, so the specific heat constant of water.

Ron: Write this down.

Ron: Is 4182 Kwh.

Laura: Oh, I've got that written down.

Ron: Yes.

Laura: So it's 15 times four, one, eight, 55.

Laura: Well, because next up comes the triangle, and I can't remember.

Laura: I'm getting a phone call.

Ron: Ask Them.

Laura: I can't answer that phone call right now.

Laura: I'm Doing Important Science.

Laura: Oh, My God.

Laura: I want to answer that phone call so loudly?

Laura: I don't know.

Ron: Actually answer it and ask them.

Ron: Tell them you're doing a quiz.

Laura: Doing a really unhelpful quiz.

Laura: 6278.25.

Laura: Now, in my notes from yesterday, I've multiplied that by 79.

Laura: I can only assume.

Laura: What am I trying to do?

Laura: I'm trying to freeze it.

Ron: Yeah, we're working out how much energy it's taking to freeze it.

Laura: All Right, the Triangle.

Laura: Is The Change.

Ron: Yeah.

Laura: So I'm Going -21.

Laura: So 6278.25.

Laura: Minus times -21 not -21.

Ron: Because the change is still 21 degrees.

Laura: Oh, I See.

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: Oh, god.

Laura: And then what does Saturn do?

Ron: No.

Ron: So The Triangle Change.

Ron: Refers to.

Ron: Okay, so theta is the temperature.

Ron: So it's just saying the change in.

Laura: Temperature so times 21.

Laura: So 131,843.25.

Ron: Correct Answers.

Ron: Jewels.

Ron: Indeed.

Laura: Oh, it was the guy that's coming to repair my sofa tomorrow.

Laura: That's who was calling me?

Ron: Definitely think you should have asked him.

Laura: I'll Ask Him Tomorrow.

Ron: Okay, one mark for question one.

Laura: So just to clarify, then So you calculate the energy required to change water by the mass multiplied by the heat constant times by the number of degrees it's got to change.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: And Not Just Water, but obviously the heat constant is going to change.

Laura: How the h*** do you find out the heat constant?

Ron: Well, rearranged the sum.

Ron: If you divided the amount of energy something took by the mass and the amount of the air.

Laura: But then how do you find out the energy?

Ron: You could put a known amount of energy into it.

Laura: Oh, clever.

Laura: This is why you're a scientist.

Ron: Yeah, but not just water.

Ron: It's like you, Laura, you would have a specific heat constant.

Laura: No, I fluctuate.

Ron: Yeah, exactly, you fluctuate, but at a regular pace.

Ron: Right, okay, question number two.

Ron: You got one mark for that ding, ding, ding ding.

Ron: I put that water bottle into a cool bag to cool down.

Ron: Eight as their own brand refreshing juice drinks.

Ron: Please describe the energy transfers within the bag.

Laura: Say all of that again, cause I was looking at my cup of tea and thinking about the energy in it.

Laura: What did you say?

Ron: That's the first step.

Ron: Start thinking about the minutiae of everything I said.

Ron: I put that water bottle into a cool bag to cool down.

Ron: As their own brand refreshing juice drinks, please describe the energy transfers within the bag.

Laura: Consensual.

Ron: Where's the energy coming from?

Laura: Where's it going to it's coming from?

Laura: Every fibre of my body wants to say the sun, and I know it isn't right, so don't listen to that bit.

Laura: Let me think more.

Laura: There's only two things in the back.

Laura: So is it the thing I think it's not the juice drinks.

Laura: The juice drinks are hot, so they have extra energy and the energy is going into the cold water bottle.

Ron: Yes, absolutely.

Ron: Heat energy is flowing from the juice drinks, the own ground refreshing juice drinks into the frozen water bottle.

Laura: Do you miss aston now?

Laura: You live in Brussels.

Laura: You talk about it quite a lot.

Ron: Do I?

Laura: I feel like it comes up.

Ron: Oh, I had to change all of this stuff because last episode you mocked me for mentioning tas depths because that's not something everyone knows about.

Ron: And then apparently J two O is too fancy, which is why I made these changes.

Ron: That was like question two was something that for the listener we covered maybe 20 minutes ago, just with different things.

Ron: Okay, yes.

Ron: Another mark for question, too.

Laura: I'm killing this quiz.

Ron: Final question.

Ron: Because it is a physics quiz, so we never cover that much.

Ron: What is a closed system?

Laura: Oh, it's like a science vacuum for thinking about hypothetical stuff in.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: And what's the sort of assumption that we make?

Laura: No wind.

Ron: Come on.

Laura: No anything except what we're talking about.

Ron: Come on.

Ron: We were close to three for three and then it is a science theoretical vacuum thing.

Ron: But it's closed.

Laura: Yeah, it's closed.

Laura: Is that what you want me to say about?

Laura: Is this one of those ones where I just have to say it's a system that's closed?

Ron: No, but maybe think about the definition of the word closed.

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: There's nothing going in it is what we're talking about, and not extra stuff.

Ron: Say that like a normal person.

Laura: What do you mean?

Laura: It's a system that is closed and it has no wind in it.

Ron: Forget wind.

Laura: It's got no friction and doors.

Ron: You're further away now.

Ron: Colder.

Laura: Like a vivarium or something, you know, like it's closed.

Ron: I don't think I can give it.

Laura: Why not?

Laura: You know, I know it will.

Ron: Then say it.

Laura: I have, in every conceivable way.

Ron: I've said it in no physics textbook in the world.

Ron: It's a closed system.

Ron: You know, there's no wind.

Ron: It's like a bavarium.

Laura: All right.

Laura: Hello, sir and professors.

Laura: This is a closed system.

Laura: It only holds the science that we're currently doing and no other science can get in or out of it to mess with the experiment.

Ron: You basically just said it.

Ron: Then replace the word science.

Ron: You said no science can get in or out of it.

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: No people no.

Ron: I don't remember last week, a person.

Laura: Clothing in the callback, no extra juice or stuff.

Ron: Yes.

Ron: No matter.

Ron: Can come in and out and that's good.

Laura: What do you want me to say?

Ron: No energy can leave or enter the system.

Laura: That's implied.

Ron: Is it?

Laura: Yes.

Ron: Half a mark.

Laura: P*** off.

Laura: Whole mark?

Ron: Absolutely.

Ron: Half a mark.

Laura: Two and a half out of three.

Laura: My physics personal best.

Ron: Well done, Laura.

Ron: Two and a half out of three.

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: Although, according to Carol statistics, I am better at physics than anything else.

Laura: So I think I was like, oh, it's my personal best, but I don't know if it was.

Laura: How does statistics work?

Laura: That's quite high, isn't it?

Ron: By Kevin's metrics, you're actually very even across the board.

Laura: Wait, I've missed.

Laura: What's happening with Kevin's Metrics?

Laura: What's happening with Kevin's Metrics?

Ron: So I think, if I'm remembering correctly, carol was waiting each mark individually the same, whereas Kevin waited each quiz individually the same.

Ron: And if you do it by Kevin's way, it was like 70% for all of them.

Ron: And then by Carol's, it varies.

Laura: Well, I don't know what that means, but good.

Laura: Well done.

Laura: I am a genius.

Laura: I think that's what we're learning over the thing.

Laura: So thank you very much, everyone, for listening and for sharing.

Laura: I don't know if it's cool to say this, but we've seen a 45% increase in listeners this week, which is just huge.

Laura: And it's down to you guys being so fun and generous and kind in sharing what we're doing.

Laura: Obviously.

Laura: Like.

Laura: We're a brand new podcast and.

Laura: Yeah.

Laura: I've got a bit of a platform which has helped us launch it.

Laura: But it's still the numbers of people that listen to your stuff is not sort of equivalent to how many followers you might have on Twitter and stuff like that.

Laura: But you guys engaging and getting involved or rating or just retweeting when episodes drop and stuff is absolutely massive and it's really been like.

Laura: A real turning moment this week of like.

Laura: Oh.

Laura: This might actually catch on and sort of become a thing.

Laura: So thank you so much where that is super down to you.

Laura: And next week, also, I did want to say, I know we do a lot of, like, reading out the interactions from people on social media.

Laura: If you're just listening quietly, we love you too.

Laura: We totally get a lot of listeners, like, listen in the car and never make contact with the people that they love.

Laura: That's me and most of the podcasts I listen to.

Laura: So hello to you too.

Laura: We do love you.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron: And even if you don't want to get if you do want to get in touch but you don't want to do it on social media because you've decided not to sell your data to everyone that might want to get it, you can get in touch, my email as well.

Laura: But we are on Gmail, so I'm sure that is still selling your data.

Ron: No, it's not the same.

Laura: Okay, cool.

Laura: Well, yeah, either way.

Laura: Silent, lurkers, noisy little lovebirds.

Laura: We love all of you.

Laura: Thank you very much for listening.

Laura: Next week, we are back.

Laura: It'll be our 10th episode, and we're back to biology.

Laura: And it's very rainy in Brussels next week, so if you're missing the rain in Parched Scorched, England, next week, you can listen to some rain.

Ron: Class is mayor.

Laura: I did it.