Not Infinitely and NOT Falafel

 Not Infinitely and NOT Falafel

Laura Lex tries to learn science from her nerdy brother, Ron

Laura: Hello and welcome to another episode of Lex, the comedy science podcast, where comedian me, Laura Lex, tries to learn science from her nerdy non comedian brother, Ron.

Ron: Hello, I'm Ron. I live in Bristol and do running and play the guitar. I love science.

Laura: Now, you're gonna be shocked to hear this, but Ron's not in the room with me today.

Ron: Yes, I am, Laura. Listen, it's me. Very believable, Ron.

Laura: Um, um, yes, Ron. And you sound divine. May I say you sound smarter this week.

Ron: Thank you, Laura. Uh, I've got an imagination this week, instead of being a small ball of grumpy science knowledge and eye rolling.

Laura: Well, Ron, I'm loving this change in attitude, but listen, we have to come clean and tell the listeners it's just me doing an impression of you.

Ron: No, no. You've been doing the impression for so long now that I've grown sentience, and now I am a separate personality.

Laura: Whoa. This is gonna be hard to live with. So now I have a brother, Ron, and a version of Ron that's also partly me.

Ron: Yes, good luck getting to sleep now. You already had too many intrusive thoughts, and now some of them are mine.

Laura: This is weird.

Ron: Um.

Ron: Um, it is, but it's. It's literally all you. I'm not here.

Laura: Oh, God. Now you're talking about your real self via.

Ron's not here this week because he's off gallivanting

Hello and welcome to another episode of Lex Education. Ron's not here. It's entirely my fault. We were scheduled to record last night, late, late, and I got very tired and didn't. And now we do not have time because I have to go to Wales and we'll be on a boat, uh, with no Internet and no, well, we'll be rocking. You can't put a microphone on something that rocks, can you? Well, I suppose you could in the boat. That rocked. They all had microphones. It was a radio sort of situation. Um, I quite liked that film, but I think it was pretty problematic, wasn't it? I don't know. Haven't watched it in years. Um, anyway, uh, Ron is also, uh, off gallivanting, so he's not around this weekend. So I'm just doing a little intro on my own today, um, to welcome you to the podcast. Um, ah, it's a fun episode this week. It's the same room episode. You've got both ends of the spectrum. You've got no Ron, and then you've got me and Ron in the same room, which is always my favourite ones to record. And if we could just maybe start, like, a change.org petition to get Ron to move back to Brighton or to, um, I don't know, upend the country so that it was possible for me to live in Bristol. Or maybe we could both, like, move to Swindon halfwayzies. That would be terrible for everybody. We don't want to do that. Um, but the same room episodes are always the most fun. Now what? What a segue. Laura.

Ron: Well done, Laura. You're so much better at doing this on your own than I am.

Laura: Hey, Ron, don't beat yourself up. It's 15 years of being in show business.

Ron: What do we call it? Show business what you do?

Laura: No, good point, Ron. But listen, live performance.

We are going to be doing a live show on Sunday 20 October

Anyway, speaking of live shows, you may have seen on social media, but you may have not. You might have a life where you don't go on social media very much. And if that's you, well done. What a healthy decision. One, you listen to this. Two, you don't spend your life on social media. And for that we applaud you. Uh, but if you haven't seen, we are going to be doing a live show. Hooray. We did one in February this year. That was a lot of fun at, uh, the Leicester festival at the black horse in Aylston. And we have one more live show this year and it is at the cheerful earful festival in Balham in, uh, the Bedford in south London. Um, we played it last year. Last year we were in the small room and tickets sold out within about two days, which was so exciting, exciting. So we've bumped up to the bigger room this year. Um, so we need you to not leave us with egg on our faces, please. Uh, we need you to come. We need you to buy tickets and come along. It is at 05:00 p.m. on Sunday. The 20 October tickets are on sale now. Uh, we will link to them all over our social media. Or if you go to cheerfulearful dot co dot uk, you'll be able to pick up your tickets there. There's loads and loads of good stuff on the lineup. Um, pappies are on, um, Zoe Lyons is there, who else is on. Olga koch gronier. All sorts of things. Uh, neurodivergent moments. We love that podcast with Jo Wells and Abigail Shalman. Um, I think that's Esther Minito's face just passing me by on the website. Is that Esther and Lily's? Yes. So all sorts of funky podcasts you could see a whole day. And obviously we love a lab rap meetup. So please, um, come if you can. That is the 20 October at 05:00 p.m. um, and we're very excited to be in the big room. It's a really cool room and it's a lovely pub. We had a great time last year. Um, in fact, was it our first live show? No, the London podcast festival was our first live show. Um, and, uh, we're not doing that one this year because we didn't sell enough tickets. Anyway, um, so enjoy this episode. Uh, well, it's a boring subject, but I think we have a great time in it. So I think you're going to enjoy it and I'll catch you afterwards.

Do you think we could do a lesson, uh, to a metronome

Ron: Do you think we could do a lesson, uh, to a metronome?

Laura: No, and I don't want to try. I can't concentrate as it is.

Ron: Perfectly in time science. Perfectly in times science. All right. That's annoying, isn't it?

Laura: Yeah. Just try not to get quiet. Turn the match right on.

Seance episode features a french travelling garden man with a good sense of rhythm

All right. Seance episode. It's seance science. We're sitting on the floor of the attic with a blanket and the microphone between us, semi cross legged, except my foot's already gone numb. Uh, lots of distractions, lots of just lots of technical troubles. And it's a weird time of day for us to record.

Ron: Yeah, late afternoon.

Laura: We don't often record at this time. I'm a bit buzzed cause I've just got to go to work in a minute. So I'm like, boo boo boo boo bong.

Ron: I've had an awful day at work, so I'm whatever the opposite of buzzed is.

Laura: What do you call a french travelling garden man with a good sense of rhythm.

Ron: Um, hang on. French. Sorry. Let me make a note of this. So I need to see if they have to cram in here. French.

Laura: A french travelling garden gnome.

Ron: Um, gnome. Garden gnome.

Laura: Garden man.

Ron: Garden man is what you said the first time. But is he a gnome or is he a man?

Laura: He's a french travelling garden man with a good sense of rhythm. I can't believe you haven't got this yet. Um.

Ron: Rhythm has your two hips moving. Okay. Mmm.

Laura: It's so obvious, Ron, you're gonna be so angry.

Ron: Hang on.

Laura: Um, listeners are screaming, screaming wherever they are, in cars, on trains, walking down the road.

Ron: All I've got is their clap over there. See, he's travelling over there. But I haven't gotten any garden into it.

Laura: It's a metronome, Ron. A metro gnome. The metro is the name of the underground in Paris.

Ron: Garden.

Laura: Garden gnome.

Ron: But then why did you say garden man? You made me think because I was.

Laura: Trying not to say gnome, and then I said gnome by accident, and I thought, well, I'll get it now because I've said gnome.

Ron: Not there. They're a clapper.

Laura: No, not there. They're a clapper. Gnome got metronome.

Ron: They're a clapper there.

Laura: A clapper. D? Me vu? Uh, no, just metronome. Really. I was thinking metro gnome.

Ron: I wonder if anyone did get that.

Laura: I think everybody did. Absolutely everybody got that.

Ron: I don't know if Metro French to Metro is lickety split. Ah.

Laura: Uh, maybe I'm not very good at doing clues. The other day we were taking a quiz, uh, and one of the questions was something like, who's the bad guy in the pantomime of Aladdin? And Tom didn't know, so I gave him a clue, and my clue was his surname could be scraaj, because the character was called Abanaza. Ah, abanaza. Scratch.

Ron: Panic.

Laura: Yeah, he did not get it.

Ron: No, no. Shouldn't have thought he would.

Laura: Abenaza. Uh, scra. It's fun, isn't it?

Ron: Yeah, it's fun.

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: Okay. There are clapper there, giddy.

Child of the podcast has inexplicably chosen quite an italian pronunciation

Laura: We did a magic draught last night, Ron.

Ron: We did the outlaws of Thunder Mountain.

Laura: Yeah, we both made. You made a very good deck. I made an okay deck. Tom made a very good deck. Robin made a terrible deck.

Ron: Yeah. Orange next door friend of the podcast, bully him.

Laura: Bully him about how bad his draught.

Ron: Deck was, how much he looks like Danny Dyer. Have you never noticed that before? Have I not pointed?

Laura: Yeah, I think you have. Yeah. Yeah. Um, you had a good fun playing with child of the podcast.

Ron: Yeah.

Laura: Child of the podcast has inexplicably chosen quite an italian pronunciation.

Ron: Ronna.

Laura: Ronna.

Ron: Where is my rona?

Laura: My Rona? Lots of people again on social media this week saying, you don't look like your voice. It makes me laugh, because I think one, of course you look like your voice.

Ron: Should have said this in the last video.

Laura: I know you too much. But also, what were they expecting? We say all the time, you're me with a beard.

Ron: Yeah. Uh, I think we had this conversation in the intros. Outros to the last.

Laura: Ah, that was weeks ago. Shut up, Ron.

Ron: It was literally last week. We're so buoyed. I wish.

Laura: That's my wedding anniversary today.

Ron: Yeah, and you're hitting high as a kite, you goofy stoner.

Laura: Whoo. You and you and my husband celebrate my wedding anniversary without me because I gotta go to work.

Ron: Yeah, we're probably gonna play more magic. Probably gonna watch sirens control the irons or whatever that's called.

Laura: Sirens control.

Ron: I accidentally rhymed it.

Laura: Oh, I thought you were doing a, uh, racist bit.

Ron: No, I don't know any korean stereotypes to be racist about. I think I know that their language is easy to learn.

Laura: Is it?

Ron: Well, the Alphabet's easy to learn.

Laura: Huh.

Ron: Apparently, like, you can.

Laura: Once you know the Alphabet, you can speak the language very fast.

Ron: Yeah, because I think it was designed, like, it's one of the few, like, designed ones. So, like, someone sat down and they were like, we're gonna make this easy. So there's, like, consistent rules to it.

Laura: Oh, that's fun.

Ron: Yeah. Apparently you can learn how to read the Alphabet in, like, 15 minutes or something.

Laura: Lush.

Ron: Yeah.

Are you korean? Have we got any korean listeners

What else?

Laura: Um, the only korean stuff I know in popular culture is Kim's convenience and the Korean. The Koreans and Gilmore girls.

Ron: Oh, uh, yeah.

Laura: Oh, yeah. I suppose. Mash. But that doesn't really tell you much about Korea, I don't think, does it? It's way more about Americans killing Koreans. Yeah. Or trying some, I guess, saving. Yeah, yeah.

Ron: Um, lots. Kim is a common korean name. Yeah, I think they do names the other way around there. Oh, so, like, when someone's called, like, Kim something, Kim is the surname.

Laura: They're not all called Kimberly is Korea where everybody has the same birthday. South Korea.

Ron: Oh, I've heard of a place like that.

Laura: All right. Lloyd, Grace. I don't know if that's true, though. But there's a place, isn't there? I can't remember who I was discussing this with. The other.

Ron: They all get older at the first of the year.

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: And also they start. They're born one. Wherever this place is.

Laura: M. Well, if you know, let us know.

Ron: Are you korean?

Laura: Have we got any korean listeners? I've never checked the stats to see if anyone listens in Korea.

Ron: No.

Laura: I'll have a look before next week. Yeah, put it in the notes, either.

Ron: Korea.

Laura: Yeah. I bet we're huge in North Korea.

Ron: Yeah, probably. Can you smell weed?

Laura: I think so, but it might be my perfume.

Ron: Is it your stony Stoney husband?

Laura: He doesn't really get stoned these days. He's used to in his youth.

Ron: Physics recap. So big problem. Oh. With these, like, um, uh, these recap episodes that we've been doing.

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: I never write down how far we get. Um, uh, on my. I think she might, because, like, mom and dad, both single syllables. And then she goes, mama, dada.

Laura: Uh, she doesn't. She goes, dad.

Ron: Yeah, but she started saying. She's saying dad earlier.

Laura: She was saying daddy, I think, by.

Ron: The way, I think she might think that Ron is just like another one of these titles.

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: My mom, my rona. My mama, maybe. Hi, mama.

Laura: But she does know that we are called Tom and Laura.

Ron: Yeah. She doesn't call you that.

Laura: No.

Ron: She might.

Laura: Yeah. She starts sassing me.

Ron: Yeah. She already sasses you every day. Yeah, she.

Laura: She's rude.

Ron: Pulls your buttons really easily.

Laura: Yeah. But that's okay. That's what I'm here for.

Ron: Yeah. It's good job. You take it so well.

Laura: Yeah. I'm so sad about that broken pressure washer. I was gonna pressure wash so much stuff today.

Ron: Yeah, it's odd.

Laura: Get a new one tomorrow. Ugh. Don't lie on the floor. I don't like it.

Ron: I'm so uncomfortable. I hate sitting on the floor.

Laura: Yeah, it's really horrible.

Ron: Maybe if I sit.

Maybe if you didn't let chairs go mouldy we wouldn't have this problem

Laura: If you hadn't thrown the fucking chair in the bin, though, uh, we wouldn't have this problem.

Ron: Maybe if you didn't let chairs go mouldy.

Laura: I mean, you, chair.

Ron: I gave you a chair.

Laura: It's downstairs in the study where you use it.

Ron: There's another one down there.

Laura: Bring it up here, then.

Ron: No.

Laura: Well, then shut up. Lounging about on the floor like a creep.

Ron: I have to lounge.

Laura: Physics recap was boring the first time we did it

Six 2.1.4 resistors now, Laura, this was boring the first time we did it. It's boring. Maybe when we did it last. Physics recap. It's gonna be boring today.

Laura: Um.

Ron: We talked. I know that. We recapped parallel and in series.

Laura: Wait, though. I found my notebook now, so it might go better.

Ron: Oh, hang on.

Laura: Resistors. I like resistors. I do recall they hold back energy in circuits. Voltage and all. What do you think about that? Series in parallel? Is that where we got to?

Ron: What were you singing then?

Laura: I don't remember. I don't recall. I have no memory of anything. Uh, it's Peter Gabriel.

Ron: Oh, I thought you were doing a. I don't like cricket. And then trying to cram a lot into the. Oh, no.

Laura: Okay, I think I found where we are. Ah. Pigeon made of beans. What are these notes? All right. Okay, go test me.

Talk me through what parallel series means

Ron: So what? Talk me through what parallel series means.

Laura: Bananas and pyjamas. This is c. Parallel series. Come on. Um, so series is just one circle with stuff on it going round in a circuit. Parallel is a series of circuits. Confusing, actually, to use the word series in the description of how parallel circuits are. Um, multiple circuits that all share a portion of the same circuit, but have other branches that do not go on the same track if you were running round it. Or banana if you were a banana.

Ron: Does it apply to a whole circuit? Always.

Laura: What?

Ron: The terms parallel in series?

Laura: Uh, well, I think technically a parallel series is lots of circuit series. Series circuits.

Ron: Stop saying series. You're saying series a lot.

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: Every other word at the moment is series.

Laura: Yeah. They're all just tied together.

Ron: What?

Laura: The circuits?

Ron: What circuits?

Laura: The ones we're discussing.

Ron: Michael and April, I think you've answered the question.

Laura: What was the question?

Ron: Does parallel series in the series, does that apply to a whole circuit?

Laura: No. To the features on the circuit?

Ron: Yes. Take it further. Because.

Laura: Because it could let in a child. Mister Water News. Um. Uh, because they have some things in common, and the rest of the circuit is not really a thing, is. It's the motorway, whereas the stuff is the buildings. They are the circuit.

Ron: Who?

Laura: The guys, the buildings. The Om guy and the battery and the light bulb.

Ron: So I think what you're trying to say is that different things like. Yeah, parallel and in series and stuff describe relationships between different things.

Laura: You a lingo to sponsor this podcast and you could learn fluent Lex education.

Ron: Yeah, that would be fun.

Laura: Sad boys means electrons.

Ron: Sad boys want three apples.

Laura: Yeah. Um, and that means zinc is making a covalent bond with magnesium.

Ron: Now, why would that never happen?

Laura: Because they're both metals.

Ron: Actually, because either of them is a metal.

Laura: Yeah. Still got the high five, though.

Ron: Yeah. Um, cool. So we'll blow through. Yeah, we did that last time. I'm pretty sure we'll breeze through that. Breeze through that.

Current is affected by being in series or in parallel

Um, so, Laura, do you remember, is it in your notes how current is affected by being in series or in parallel?

Laura: Well, I think the current would be reduced in parallel because it's got to go in different directions, whereas in series, it's just running in one race.

Ron: Yep. So what can you say about the current going through two things that are in series?

Laura: It is halved.

Ron: That's not what you just said.

Laura: In series, it is 100%.

Ron: It's the same.

Laura: It's the same.

Ron: Yes. Okay, what about in parallel?

Laura: 50% in each of the tracks.

Ron: Would it be 50%?

Laura: No.

Ron: What would the defining thing be that defines how much current goes down each parallel banana? How do you, how do you work out what the current is? Look at me. Look at the book.

Laura: The book has nothing in it.

Ron: There it is. The Vvir.

Laura: Uh, Ron, these are not helpful notes.

Ron: I just pointed out which bit on that page. It was.

Laura: V equals I times r.

Ron: What does v stand for?

Laura: Voltage.

Ron: What does the I mean?

Laura: Current.

Ron: What does the r, uh, mean?

Laura: Resistance. So voltage equals current times resistance.

Ron: Yeah.

Laura: Yes.

Ron: What defines the voltage in a circuit?

Laura: The current and the resistance.

Ron: No, m. Yes.

Laura: Voltage equals current times resistance.

Ron: That's how you work it out.

Laura: Well, that must be what defines it, then.

Ron: No.

Laura: Uh, yes.

Ron: No. Yes. No.

Laura: I think falafel equals chickpeas blended up. What defines falafel? Chickpeas.

Ron: No, no, that's not true. That's like saying that, like, the more. The bigger the falafel, the longer you have to cook it for. That's like saying that the length of cook time makes the falafel bigger.

Laura: It does?

Ron: No, it doesn't.

Laura: Things expand when they're hot.

Ron: Not infinitely.

Laura: No.

Ron: And not falafel.

Laura: Not infinitely and not falafel. Good day to you, sir. I will have my hat back.

You can't just kill humanoid beasts. No. You can't. Yeah, you can't

Abanaza scratch habernaza squad what clue would you give to get someone to guess the name Abanaza?

Ron: Abanaza nas. It's nars.

Laura: That's quite, uh, Kelis's ex husband, who's Khaleese. My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard and they're like, it's better than yours.

Ron: Oh, naz the rapper, man.

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: Yeah.

Laura: Actually, they might still be married. I don't know why I've divorced them. I'm not sure.

Ron: Yeah. Um, so, but what makes. What. What changes the resistance in a circuit?

Laura: Uh, what changes the resistance in the circuit? Resistors and items.

Ron: Items?

Laura: Bulbs.

Ron: Yes, things.

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: Yeah. So not the voltage and the current, which is what you said last time, kind of is. No. So, bit of current going down. Circuit comes to a branch in the road. That is two bits that are in power.

Laura: One of them spooky and dark and the other has rainbows and bunnies. Which way, Philippe?

Ron: Yes.

Laura: Oh, this way. It'll be a shortcut. Money. Get attacked by wolves and then your daughter has to go live in a castle with a beast. No.

Ron: Then they sing. They sing nicely.

Laura: I love you in the snow, hairy man.

Ron: And there's a lovely library and some sexy dusters.

Laura: Dusters. Oh, come over here, Mister Duster.

Ron: And there's a man at the village who.

Laura: Oh, hello. I'm an evil man.

Ron: He eats eggs and he's a misogynist. But is there, like, was he evil? Evil?

Laura: Yeah, he tries to kill the beast.

Ron: Yeah, he kills a beast. He didn't know that. The beast. He didn't know that the beast was a man.

Laura: You still can't just kill a beast.

Ron: We used to kill beasts all the time.

Laura: It wasn't. Okay. Is it still recording? I just. Paranoid. Yeah, you can't. You can't. Yeah, but I think the beast is quite humanoid. You can't just kill humanoid beasts.

Ron: Um. Um, I think back in beauty beast, also, he's like.

Laura: He tries to kidnap spell's dad.

Ron: That's pretty evil. That's the kind of thing I was asking for. I just think if there's a horned monster running around in the forest, capered.

Laura: Or not, he's not hurting anyone.

Ron: Yeah, but you don't know if it's.

Laura: Gonna hurt someone, Ron, this is getting down bad lines. You can't lock everybody up in case they hurt someone because they look a bit dodgy.

Ron: Everyone but beasts.

Laura: You be the first one locked, uh, up. You look like an absolute fucking beast.

Ron: Yeah, but, like, I'm not a beast.

Laura: Well, that's what the beast thinks.

Ron: I, uh, look like the halfway point.

Laura: The beast is also not a beast in his heart, once he's in love.

Ron: No, but, like, I also think that, like, in a different world, that story might have been the story of heroic Gaston, who worked out all his days locked up an old man. We'll put the elder abuse on the sidelines for now.

Laura: Uh, save the village from an invention blowing its guy high.

Ron: Yeah, he could be an antihero.

Laura: Kind of gave free psychiatric help. Paid for the psychiatric help of an old man.

Ron: Yeah, and he's got his little pug man, Theroux. Whatever the foo. Uh, Louis Theroux in it.

Laura: Yeah, hanging out.

Ron: Elder abuses. That's kind of niche for Disney, then.

Laura: Healthcare they had back then, locking up old men in an asylum because it's an asylum keeper he sells them to.

Ron: Oh, that's fine. So we can take that one off as well.

He just wanted her as a trophy wife, he says

So what did he actually do? Apart from love someone?

Laura: He didn't love her. He just wanted her as a trophy wife. Even though there's three blonde girls on a bench or readily available.

Ron: Yeah, but he's had them, probably.

Laura: Oh, no, those poor little cartoon hymens. Um.

Ron: That's pretty horrific.

Laura: Yeah, it's horrible, isn't it?

Ron: I'm glad you got two of them.

Laura: Yeah, they're actually quite cool awards that I won, but the actual awards are so horrible.

Ron: Yeah, yeah, you can put those up in your bedroom.

Laura: They're up here with all the other ugly stuff. No. Get down, please.

Ron: Get down. Not safe.

Laura: Get down, please, darling. Good girl.

Ron: Come on, sweetheart.

Laura: Good girl.

Ron: Uh, thank you.

Laura: Good girl, baby.

So what were we talking about? A fork in the road, Gaston

So what were we talking about? A fork in the road, Gaston.

Ron: A fork in the road. Yeah. So a bit of tiny.

Laura: And you're like, somebody was eating noodles here, but they've gone with the noodles and only left the fork.

Ron: Is that a beauty and the beast reference?

Laura: No, it's a reference finding a fork lying in a road.

Ron: Right. Right.

Laura: Giddy. Um, please don't pull the wool out of my blanket.

Ron: That's just the bobblets.

Laura: I don't like this blanket.

Ron: Can I pull the wool out of it, then?

Laura: No. Um, it's because this room is never a good temperature. It's always hot or freezing.

Ron: Yeah, it's perfect for mould.

Laura: It's the opposite of a mole room because it's at the top, it says mould. Oh, God. Yeah. Well, look at the state of the window. That's mouldy.

Ron: Lot of cobbers.

Laura: Yeah. I don't clean up here very.

Ron: No. You didn't get your cleaner to come up here?

Laura: No, I didn't make somebody come up here. Poor woman.

Ron: She was nice.

Laura: She was nice.

Ron: Yeah.

Laura: She can come again.

Ron: It's uncomfortable being in someone else's house while they've got to clean her.

Laura: Oh, it's uncomfortable being in your own house when the cleaners.

Ron: Yeah, but then at least, like, you're like, this is a. This is a social contract we've arranged. Whereas I was like, kind of colleagues, some just working, too.

Laura: Not colleagues, because you don't work for me.

Ron: I do. I do this.

Laura: You get paid more than me to do this.

Ron: That's how businesses work. Someone pays someone else to do a thing.

Laura: I'm not paying you.

Ron: You are paying me.

Laura: How am I paying you? The patrons are paying you.

Ron: Yeah, customers.

Laura: That's patrons. Yeah, but I'm not the boss here, you are. No, I'm not.

Ron: You're always telling me what to do.

Laura: That's because you don't do anything.

Ron: I do.

Laura: We're supposed to be partners. If you just did it of your.

Ron: Own accord, you're in charge of social media.

Laura: Yeah, but every week I have to casually go, hey, any clips this week?

Ron: That's not true. Not every week.

Laura: And what?

Ron: Hmm?

Laura: But even the weeks where you've done them, you've put them somewhere weird.

Ron: I always put them in the episode folder.

Laura: Can you put them in the list I asked you to put them in so that I know they're there?

Ron: No.

Laura: Why?

Ron: Because I don't know why that's better.

Laura: Because otherwise, I don't know how to plan the week of social media stuff.

Ron: But I, uh, upload the episode. And I upload the clips at the same time all into the folder.

Laura: Not always.

Ron: Not always. No one's saying always. What I said was not never.

Laura: Okay. Not never. But I'd say one in ten times.

Ron: No. Uh, that's hogshit. Two in five, at least.

Laura: Absolutely not.

Let's imagine there's a battery. The battery makes the voltage happen

Anyway, we come to a fork in the road.

Ron: Yes. Uh, no. A lily bit of current comes to.

Laura: A fork in the road. Yeah.

Ron: It's. Your original hypothesis was that 50% was gonna go down each branch.

Laura: Mm hmm.

Ron: What if there's three branches?

Laura: Whoa. 33.333 recurring.

Ron: But no.

Laura: No.

Ron: So we know what defines the current.

Laura: I times r. Uh, no, what defines the current? I equals r. Uh, in the circuit.

Ron: Let'S imagine there's a battery. The battery makes the voltage happen. Right. The potential difference.

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: So then. And we've already said that the resistance is done by the bits in the circuit.

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: Yeah.

Ron says Tom Holland never lies down to his podcast

Laura: So, Ron, you've moved so far away from the microphone. What did I say when we did the sound test? I said, that's okay, but you can't get any further away than.

Ron: No, you said I couldn't get quiet.

Laura: You're getting further away, which is quiet. Sit back up.

Ron: They hate to sit on the floor.

Laura: Well, then don't throw people's chairs in the bed.

Ron: They only threw the back away. So we know that the voltage is set by the bedroom. Stop shouting.

Laura: You can't do this like this. You are lying down far away from the microphone.

Ron: I think it's fine. See?

Laura: Um, maybe it is.

Ron: Yeah. So.

Laura: Fucking hell. Tom Holland never lies down to his podcast.

Ron: Tom Holland.

Laura: Yeah. Not Spider man. Another man. Yeah. I just loved harm and ze. I loved Tom Zayer. Tom. Tommanda. Zen Nanda.

Ron: Tom Hollander. Now I've listened to a podcast with Tom Hollander on it.

Laura: That, like, grumpy actor.

Ron: Yeah.

Laura: I don't know anything about him, really, apart from that my day thing that he wrote that went viral.

Ron: He was in Pirates of the Caribbean.

Laura: Yeah, but that doesn't tell you anything about him.

Ron: Yeah.

Laura: What does it tell you?

Ron: No, I'm agreeing. Yeah.

Laura: Oh. Uh. So why are you so keen to listen to this podcast? I think you would listen to our podcast.

Ron: I do sometimes if I haven't edited it.

Laura: Didn't last week, did you?

Ron: No, because you hadn't edited it.

Laura: Still haven't. Yes. Fucking forking the road wrong. Can we just cover this? Otherwise we're gonna be.

Harry Probst: Resistance is set by the stuff in the circuit

Ron: So the voltage is set by the battery. We've already said that the resistance is set by the stuff in the circuit. So bit of current comes to a fork in the road, what's going to happen?

Laura: It'll get pulled to what needs it, kind of, yeah.

Ron: So the resistance of the different bits in circuit in. In parallel, rather, are going to define how much current goes down each bit.

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: So let's say that there's a, um, one bit of parallel circuit. There's eight buzzers and a twinkly d and nine light bulbs. And on the other side, there's just one light bulb. What's gonna happen?

Laura: More current will go down the eight buzzers and a twinkly dee. Unless it's a really powerful light bulb and they're really weak buzzers.

Ron: It's not true.

Laura: No, it's not true.

Ron: Look at this. Look at this. The formula I squared. Why are you saying that? Look at the formula.

Laura: Which formula?

Ron: The one that calculates current.

Laura: I equals v over r. Uh, yeah.

Ron: So if r gets bigger, that is more resistance. That is twinkly D's and light bulbs.

Laura: Yep.

Ron: What's gonna happen to you? I. Ah.

Laura: Smaller.

Ron: Yeah. So less current. Why do you look so bewildered? We just worked it out because it.

Laura: Just seems weird to me that to power more things, you have less current.

Ron: But what's the definition of current?

Laura: I don't know.

Ron: Flow of charge.

Laura: Flow of charge?

Ron: Yeah. So it just means it's going slower down there. Probst. Oh, uh, I think, uh, I don't know. Maybe not affected by the speed. Actually. I don't really know how any of this works. I find it all quite dull.

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: Oh, we've been recording. Bloody hell. Half an hour, Harry. Um, the sum of the current across all the bits in parallel will equal the total current. There's a tidbit for you.

Laura: Tidbit.

Ron: Um, the total resistance of two resistors in parallel is less than the individual resistance of the smallest resistor.

Laura: This sounds like some sort of, like, piece of wisdom that you would find in a book.

Ron: I guess it is, if you think about it.

Laura: Yeah. Valid. Oh, so boring.

Ron: Yeah.

Laura: I can't believe we're doing it again.

Ron: Can you say that back to me?

Laura: Two resistors next to each other are less resisting than a single resistor.

Ron: Yup. All right.

Laura: Why would you ever have two resistors, then, if you accidentally bought a too powerful resistor? Lesson learned.

Ron: I don't think you get any of this, do you?

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: I don't think you understand why.

Laura: I think I do.

Ron: Because I think in your head, you've got a wire, and then it's going to split off into bits that are in parallel and then join back up again. And I think. You think that's the point. It's like, oh, we split it all up. Oh, it's being resisted.

Laura: I don't really know why. It's called resistance. That's confusing, I think.

Ron: Why?

Laura: What's it resisting?

Ron: Yeah, flow of charge current.

Laura: But then, um, why. Why is it resisting them?

Ron: What do you mean?

Laura: Why do you want to resist the flow of charge?

Ron: Well, for some, um, you know, you might have delicate components in a circuit that can't take that much current.

Laura: Then you say that the components are also resisting.

Ron: Yeah, they also have resistance to them. So twofold, like why we learn about it like this one. Resistors do exist in circuits to limit the amount of current going down a bit and stuff like that. Because if you think about it, every single thing in a country is plugged into the wall and gets the same amount of stuff coming out of it, you know, whether it's a twinkly d or a light bulb. But they don't all need that. So then you have to have a bit of the circuit that sorts out and gets the right amount of power going in. Okay.

Laura: Okay.

Nobody's becoming an electrician after listening to this podcast

Ron: Point number two. Why we learn about it like this is because of exactly, um, what you just said. Everything that you put in a circuit has a certain amount of resistance that it will put on the circuit. So if you're going to go on to be a circuit person, um, an electrician. Yeah, um, you have to. Or a circuit maker, you have to understand that when you put the twinkly d in there, that's going to have an effect.

Laura: I'd hope if you were going on to be an electrician, there'd be more training than this.

Ron: Yes, but this is GCSE, so you just kind of get started and then you sort of work out what you want and then you have a life.

Laura: Yeah, yeah, I did.

Ron: Yeah.

Laura: Okay.

Ron: Nobody's becoming an electrician after listening to this podcast.

Laura: Somebody might.

Ron: Yeah. I think we should nominate someone.

Laura: I love rewiring plugs.

Ron: Yeah, I like, um, there are lots of schools in Somerset that I did all the wiring for.

Laura: All the ones that are currently on, um. Fire.

Ron: Da da da da da da. Okay. Six. 2.3 domestic uses and safety.

Laura: Okay.

Ron: Main current is Ac. Do you know what that means?

Laura: Alternating current.

Ron: What's the other way?

Laura: Direct current? DC.

Ron: Well, how many volts in the UK?

Laura: 130.

Ron: How many Hertz?

Laura: 80.

Ron: No.

Laura: Was I right with 113?

Ron: Oh, no, I wasn't listening. It's 230.

Laura: 16 hz.

Ron: There's 50.

Laura: Hurts.

Ron: What's hurts? Sometimes, um.

Laura: Hurts.

Ron: A gavina.

Laura: Yes, hurts. Uh, sausages.

Ron: Sog. Werner. Hurts.

Laura: Yeah, that's the thing. What is Hurts is. Hurts the slide depth.

Ron: No.

Laura: I haven't mentioned Hertz in the notes anywhere. Hurts. What's Hertz? Oh, 50 hz frequency. Hertz is frequency.

Ron: Don't do that. Um. Yes, it's the SI unit of frequency.

Laura: Standard.

Ron: Standard international. So that means. What does that mean in terms of ac current?

Laura: It's alternating, currently at 50 amps, um, per second.

Ron: What does that mean?

Laura: I was trying to get all of the words into it.

Ron: That's part of your problem, isn't it? What does alternating current mean? What's alternating about it?

Laura: The electrons do what? I don't know. Swing.

Ron: Swing where?

Laura: I don't know. Around the wire.

Ron: Like this? No, back and forth.

Laura: Where?

Ron: In the wire? Huh?

Laura: Uh, up. Uh, and down, or lengthways?

Ron: Depends what the wire. The wire is.

Laura: Oh, um. Okay.

Ron: Along the wire.

Laura: Along the whole length of it.

Ron: Up and down it, but back and forth, but.

Laura: Oh, okay.

Ron: And they change direction 50 times a second.

Laura: Whoop.

Mains electricity has three core cables that fight badness

It's very fast. Yeah, I couldn't do that.

Ron: No. Um.

Laura: Um.

Ron: That's. That bit.

Laura: Nice.

Ron: Six, 2.3.2.

Laura: I've got three minutes.

Ron: Let's fuck it off, then.

Laura: No, do it in three minutes.

Ron: Six, 2.3.2. Mains electricity. They have three core cables. What are the colours and what do they do?

Laura: Earth, wind, fire. They fight badness.

Ron: Remember?

Laura: Um, it's Earth wire, which is brown, green and yellow. It's green and yellow.

Ron: Yeah.

Laura: Live wire is brown. Livewire is blue. Live wire is brown.

Ron: Yeah.

Laura: Neutral wire is blue.

Ron: Yes. Yes. And what do those three things do?

Laura: Earth wire is like a safety thing for if there's an overcharge of electricity, it, like, pooms it into the ground so no one gets hurt.

Ron: Yeah.

Laura: Uh, live wire carries the current.

Ron: Yeah.

Laura: Neutral. I know. Makes, uh, chocolate and, um, hides money in good banks.

Ron: Switzerland. Humour.

Laura: Yeah.

Ron: Neutral, uh, completes the circuit.

Laura: You complete me.

Ron: And that's the recap.

Laura: We did amazing work there, Ron.

Ron: Yeah. When it's once we got our shit together, that's all right, wasn't it?

Laura: Now time to pull our shit apart again.

Ron: See you in the outro.

Laura: Whoo. Oh, it won't be floor by then. That'll be nice.

Ron: Yeah. I hate this.

Laura: So you do this again tomorrow?

Ron: Oh, yeah.

Laura: You're the one that has to stop recording today.

Ron: Class dismissed.

Laura: No. There you go, you tiny legends. How much did you love that same room? Episodes they're just always better, aren't they? And, hey, here's an idea. If more of you joined the Patreon, um, what should we call this one? Like, a bargaining one? Let's call this bargaining, and I'll message Ron to tell him to put that on the old spreader. If we had a good amount of patrons, we could afford to. To, um, travel to do same room episodes more often. Like, we could clear a day and go, hey, this is a paid job. Let's meet up and do same room episodes. So if you like the same room episodes, and you're like, that was top quality. I loved it even more than I normally love it. Get on the patron, and if you hated it, um, pop round to a patron's house and tell them to cancel their patreon, find out where they live, and go around and say, hey, I hate the same room episodes. Stop funding them.

Ron: Don't do that, please.

Laura: For several reasons. One, I don't want to lose patrons. It's really sad. And two, you shouldn't go around to people's houses unless they've invited you. Even then, don't do it. Just text. Um, I wanted. Did anybody get metronome? Surely you were screaming at your headphones about metronome. Surely you were. Were you were? You were. Oh, come on.

We've got a fan art opportunity now. What do you think Ron looks like

Um, we also. I've got a fan art opportunity now. Um, possibly a good one for people who are not on social media or who haven't seen one of our videos yet. What do you think Ron looks like? Can you draw us a picture of how you first pictured Ron or how you picture him now? Or maybe if you're not, like, a visual artist, write us a little poem or a limerick or a haiku. Throw some words together. Do one of those visual things where some words are big and some are small. You know, do that. What does Ron look like to you? Spiritually? Emotionally? Emotionally, it looks like a small black ball with barbed wire around it. We know that, but what does. What is wrong to you? What is. Ron. Ronnie, don't hurt me. He's gonna be so cross when he hears this. I can picture his stupid little face now. I think he's on a train to Brussels and, uh, uh. And then I might be at work. I can't remember. He said he had to get up early today. I assumed it was go to Brussels, and, um. And he'll be listening to this and going, she's an idiot. He's not wrong, but I'm m not sad. Um, he's also put in the notes.

Do we have any korean listeners? That would be fun

Do we have any korean listeners? I think we talked about Korea in this episode. I haven't had a chance to listen yet. We're a shambles this week. The summer's hard, man. We're all over the place. Um, are you listening in Korea? That would be fun. Hey, get in touch if you are listening from really far away from where we record. So we record in the south of England. I know we've got a few canadian listeners. I know we've got some us listeners. Have we got anybody listening that's not in the English speaking as a first language world? Anybody in far flung Europe or. I think we've got australian listeners. And I know we've got a New Zealand listener because they came over for one of the live shows. In fact, the cheerful live show that I mentioned, um, at the beginning of the episode. Let us know. I want to know where you all are. Um, right. I'm starting to feel a little bit like I'm doing hospital radio, and I have to go unpack because I have to go to Cardiff today, and, um, I'm going on the train with little dog of the podcast Mackie dog. We're going to be staying on agony dad's boat. Um, I'm very excited about it, but I feel like I'm going to feel like a wanker when I get to the gig. And everybody says, you're not in the hotel, Laura. And I say, no, I'm staying on daddy's yacht. And it really makes me sound like a real twat. Um, maybe I just am one.

Ron: You are, Laura.

Laura: Ah, fuck off, Ron. Okay. Uh, end of the episode. Thanks very much. You are the greatest listeners in the world. Um, join our Patreon buy tickets to cheerfulear for podcast festival. And mostly, though, take care of yourselves. Take care of everyone around you. Do what you can to stand up for people. And, um, the gift shop is open.

Ron: Until 09:00 p.m. class dismiss.